▶ Your Answer :
There has been a debate in recent times
what which among
libraries, athletics, or transportation should the authority cease
developing if they are required need more money. As I see it, it should drop to spend
their money on sports. This is because not only can athletics make it difficult
for them to levy tax, but also athletics should contemplate personal
perspective rather than the governmental level.
To begin with, it is hard to earn tax
from athletics. This does not mean that I completely ignore the merits of
athletics in that it can make it possible for civilian
people to get a good shape. However, libraries a library (뒤에서 쭉 it즉 단수로 받고 있으니까.) can reap
more the benefits since it serves as offering education, and it helps the
government yield well-educated people that could make a lot of profits in money for their nation by working and researching.
This will have a great impact on the administration’s tax revenue and competitiveness. For example, recently, my
government announced a policy that they decided on stopping to develop
athletics instead of libraries. This is because if they did stop to invest on
libraries, they will not be able to make well-rounded people that are more
important for the country than athletics. As a result, the government can
impose a lot of money from well-rounded people who performed their task
outstandingly, standing out in the competitive world.
On top of that, athletics should
consider a personal perspective, not governmental level. In detail, even though if the
government drops to develop athletics, many people can enjoy a lot of athletics
by attending private sports center or taking a walk at the natural roads.
On the other hand, it is essential to develop transportation continuously otherwise or it can
cause heavy traffic congestion. For instance, in 1990, Japan ceased developing
transportation system instead of athletics since they thought transportation
was unnecessary, so they have spent more money on athletics. As a result, the
rate of traffic jam has skyrocketed, leading to being
a paralyzed transportation system. The
administration realized that they needed to invest their money on
transportation again instead of athletics. This case shows that transportation
is more integral for the government rather than athletics.
To sum up, if
the government has to decide to stop developing due to the lack of budget among
athletics, libraries and transportation, I think the government should drop
developing athletics. This is because athletics should contemplate not
government perspective but a personal level, and it is difficult to impose duty
than other ways. In this regard, I firmly believe the government should stop
developing if they need more money.
Writing 0-30 scale
Fair(23-25)
주장을 세우고 두 가지 point를 잘 정했습니다. 다만 문법과 표현 면에서 아쉬운 부분이 많습니다. 서론에서 주제를 제시할 때에는 원 문제를 왜곡, 과장, 축소해서는 안됩니다.
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