■ Direction Read the question below. You have 30 minutes to plan, write, and revise your essay. Typically, an effective response will contain a minimum of 300 words. ■ Question Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Use specific reason and examples to support your answer |
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▶ Topic :
Teacher
should be paid according to the grades their students receive. |
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▶ Your Answer :
There has been a debate in recent times
whether instructors should earn their wages according to student’s grades. As I
see it, student’s marks cannot be a consideration with respect to teacher’s
monthly pay. This is on account of the fact that not only could teachers
deceive student’s grades in order to receive high wages, but also they can be
stressed out.
To begin with, teachers can cheat student’s
academic grades to be paid a high salary. This does not mean that I completely
ignore the advantages of giving teachers’ wages according to students’ marks in
that it might improve a quality of education. However, I strongly believe that offering
their salary depending on students’ performances is one of the most dangerous
types in terms of cheating. Let me give you an example related my personal
experience. When I was high school of junior, my school announced a new policy
that teachers could receive their wages according to student’s marks. However,
this policy had a negative impact on teachers. Many teachers revealed the exam
material before the test that must have been top secret since they wanted to earn
the high salary. As a result, school canceled their decision, and many teachers
had been punished, and fired by the board of school administration. This
experience shows that instructors’ wages cannot be standard depending on students’
grades.
On top of that, teachers can be stressed
out. As many people know, giving teachers’ wages depending on students’ marks is
not necessarily negative in that it would improve teacher’s morale; Nonetheless,
the demerits which can suffer from this policy are too enormous to deny. For
example, When I was high school of senior, my Music teacher had great pressure.
This is because most students were not interested in music, and they studied
only university-admission-related subject. This lead students’ music grades to
fall down, and her wages became lower. As a result, she resigned school due to finding
a new job that guaranteed high salary. This case indicates that teachers’
monthly pay cannot be different according to students’ marks.
To sum up, instructors’ salary should not be
affected by students’ academic outcomes. This is because it can bring about a
lot of stress for the teachers, and teacher can be likely to manipulate students’
grades. In this regard, I firmly believe that teachers’ wages should not be
paid according to students’ academic marks |
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There has been a debate in recent times whether
instructors should earn their wages according to student’s grades. As I see it, student’s marks cannot be a consideration with respect to teacher’s monthly pay. This is on account of the fact that not only could
teachers deceive student’s grades in order to receive
high wages, but also they can be stressed out.
To begin with, teachers can cheat student’s academic grades to be paid a high
salary. This does not mean that I completely ignore the advantages of giving
teachers’ wages according to students’ marks in that it might improve a quality of education.(생략하세요) However, I
strongly believe that offering their salary depending on students’ performances is one of the most
dangerous types in terms of cheating. Let me give you an example related my
personal experience. When I was high school of junior, my school announced a
new policy that teachers could receive their wages according to student’s marks. However, this policy had a negative impact on teachers.
Many teachers revealed the exam material before the test that must have been
top secret since they wanted to earn the high salary. As a result, school
canceled their decision, and many teachers had been punished, and fired by the
board of school administration. This experience shows that instructors’ wages cannot be standard depending on students’ grades.
On top of that, teachers can be stressed out. As many
people know, giving teachers’ wages depending on students’ marks is not
necessarily negative in that it would improve teacher’s
morale; Nonetheless, the demerits which can suffer from this policy are too
enormous to deny. (어떻게 스트레스 받는지 설명하지 않았습니다.) For example, when
I was high school of senior, my music teacher had great pressure. This is
because most students were not interested in music, and they studied only
university-admission-related subjects. This lead students’ music grades to fall down, and her
wages became lower. As a result, she resigned school due to finding a new job
that guaranteed high salary. This case indicates that teachers’ monthly pay cannot be different according to students’ marks. (예시가 스트레스와 관련이 없습니다.)
To sum up, instructors’ salary should not be affected by students’
academic outcomes. This is because it can bring about a lot of stress for the
teachers, and teacher can be likely to manipulate students’ grades. In this regard, I firmly believe that teachers’ wages should not be paid according to students’ academic marks
Writing 0-30 Score Scale
Fair (17-23)
Overall Comment: 내용이 부족한 부분이 많습니다. 본론의 첫 번째 문단에서 반대 의견 언급을 생략하세요. 본론의 2번째 문단에서는 부가적 진술에 이유에 표현했던 스트레스대한 디테일이 없습니다.
선생님들이 어떻게 스트레스 받는지 설명하지 않았습니다. 예시도 스트레스와 관련이 없습니다. 꼭 부가적 진술과 예시는 이유 위주로 선택하고 구성해야 합니다.