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Which Whether people learn about life by playing games teaches, or not is the subject of debate. Some people think that playing games is meaningless because it is just for having enjoyable time. However, I think that we can acquire lessons by playing games because it make us realize not only relationship between endeavor and reward but also opportunity cost.
First of all, I agree with the idea that playing games has didactic aspects because people can learn about the relationship between endeavor and reward. To be specific, in most of games, people should make effort in order to get rewards or to graduate into next stages. In addition, although the next stages are more difficult to settle them, people get rewards again by making much endeavor. I think that it is same with our life because in order to get rewards effort is required. After enough amount of endeavor, people can obtain rewards such as employment, high wage, and scholarship. For example, I realized this lesson when I was a student. I used to play the game, called as StarCraft. The more much time and effort I invested in to the game, the more players I could can win. Thus, by investing time and endeavor, I acquired ability to play the game better, as well as got the high level in the game.
In addition, considering the opportunity cost, people can learn about life by playing games. Apart from that we realized lessons in game, as I mentioned above, playing games itself provides another lesson. We have to give up our time in order to play games, because we can not do two things, such as studying and playing the games, at the same time. Especially, many students give up their time to study, enjoy with friend, and love, for playing games. It is similar to life. We should give up some values in order to obtain other things. In my case, I sometimes played games when I was young, and I knew that I could not do any other things to play the games. Now, because I realized them at that time, I know that I can not make performances in both areas, being a lawyer, and being a soccer player. So, I concentrate on the way to be a soccer player now. 게임을 하면서 배우는 인생의 교훈이라기에는 다른 활동으로도 충분히 배울 수 있는 교훈이기 때문에 현재 주제에는 딱 맞는 주장이라 보기는 어렵습니다. body1처럼 '게임을 함으로써' 얻을 수 있는 교훈을 더 생각해보시면 좋을 것 같아요.
In conclusion, although playing games is unlikely to be helpful, it provides some lessons. We can realize that reward requires us to make effort, as well as that we should consider opportunity cost when choosing specific values. Playing games may be our teacher of life.
Writing 0–30 score scale Fair - Good (22-24)
전반적으로 글의 논리 흐름이나 사례 연결이 매끄럽게 잘 제시되어 있습니다. 다만 body2는 꼭 놀이를 해야만 얻을 수 있는 교훈은 아니기 때문에 주제와의 연관성이 떨어진다는 아쉬움이 있습니다. 다른 주장으로 문단을 다시 구성해보시는 것도 좋을 것 같아요. 논제에서 묻는 play games는 '놀이하는 것'에 대한 내용이므로 너무 컴퓨터 게임에만 치우쳐서 논의가 진행되지 않도록 하는 부분도 신경써주세요. 수고 많으셨습니다. ^^
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