▶ Your Answer :
Undoubtedly, the
understanding of a foreign country plays a significant role in people’s daily lives in many of the places where they work or play. Some people
think that the best way to learn about a foreign country is to read newspapers
and magazines from there while others do not. (주제 문장 그대로 사용 지양해주시고 paraphrase해 주세요) Both sides may have their own
reasons to support their views. If I were asked to choose one, I would say that
taking a trip to other nations is a better way to learn about different cultures
and histories. There are several reasons as follows.
To begin with,
reading newspapers and magazines is not the best way to learn about other
nations because readers can obtain biased information. Journalists have their
own personal views, beliefs, and values. When their personal thoughts are
conveyed to readers, they are likely to form a skewed idea of country. For
example, Duke University found a huge difference between two groups of young
children in their understanding of the foreign country, Syria. One group was consisted of those who read newspapers to understand the Syrian refugee crisis
and the other group was made up of those who actually visited the country to
understand it. The former was more likely to have a lower level of accuracy in
understanding the refugee crisis of the country than the latter. In particular,
many of the first group had an extreme one-sided feeling about the refugees,
while most of the second group acknowledged the pros and cons of accepting the
refugees in their own country. This implies that people do not get an accurate
source of information on a country through reading newspapers or magazines.
Additionally, when people travel around the world,
it provides a chance to broaden their horizons and be aware of other countries.
It exposes them to different lifestyles, customs, and cultures. Such exposure
is likely to help them to acknowledge that different values exist, to understand
this diversity, and to ultimately be comfortable with it. For example, when I
was in high school, I saw one of my classmates from Ethiopia eating his mean
with bare hands. I felt very uncomfortable by his behavior because it was my
first time seeing someone like that and I read an article castigating such
behavior in a newspaper. I kept my distance from him and sometimes made fun of
him. However, after traveling to Africa last year, I got used to this cultural
difference. I realized that we just had different eating styles that was described the article I read in high school. In fact, we had a lot in common in a way that
we all cared about our family and friends, were committed to relationships, and
got easily hurt by what others say. I no longer feel awkward and can understand
their cultures better.
All things considered, the advantages of going on a
trip far outweigh those of newspapers and magazines for the reasons I have
mentioned above. All in all, the importance of taking a trip cannot be
overestimated in life.
- 주제는 read news and magazine이 best 인지 아닌지에 초점을 맞추고 있으므로 "여행이 좋은 방법이다" 라는 부분은 "잡지와 신문 외에도 직접 해당 국가를 여행하여 그 나라에 대해 더욱 정확한 내용을 배울 수 있다"는 방향으로 작성해주세요.
Writing 0–30 score scale: Limited (1-16) / Fair (17-23) / Good (24–30)
ADDRESSING TOPIC
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ORGANIZATION
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PROGRESSION AND COHERENCE
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LANGUAGE USE
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GRAMMAR
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GOOD
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GOOD
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GOOD
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GOOD
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GOOD
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각 카테고리별 SCORE: LIMITED / FAIR / GOOD
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