▶ Your Answer : I agree that movies tell a lot about a country in three reasons. 인트로에 적합하지 않는 거 같습니다. 인트로의 기본 구조는 hook 상대방 의견 본인의 의견을 다루고 있습니다. 지금 이 부분은 적절치 않습니다.
First, movies mirror a mind of director and the director would be a person of a country. When a director make a film, the person want to tell his(or her) own story and it is sometimes subject, not object a director makes a film, person wants to tell own story which is sometimes subjective.. Even five people suffer a same case, they all think that case different and understand it different. I think one of a reasons why people think same case different is they live in different society. The society can be a city, a village or a country so movies mirrors the way people usually think in a country. 뭔가 이유에 반영되는 구체적인 설명이 빈약한 거 같습니다. 이 바디를 통해 어떠한 것을 말하고자 하는 것인지 잘 모르겠습니다.
Second, actors in movies use the languages of their country and I think a language shows many things about a country. For example, in the Korean film '땐뽀걸스' actors use the dialog of Kyeongsang-do and the dialog show us the emotion very well. Compared in countries, there is a different point how intense people express their thought. Korean says more directly and strongly but Japanese usually says more indirectly and weakly. Therefore, movies that use specific languages tell a lot about a country.
Third, there is a traditional genre in movie categories. Traditional movies show us how people wear, say, eat in the past and the history is a real basement of countries. Time passed, history is stored in the form of culture, mind of the people and even personality. For instance, Korea has many wars and they were almost attacked by other countries, not attack them. For this reason, Korean had to move their living places quickly and frequently. In modern ages, many Korean still want all situations to be worked fast. Some Korean traditional movies show well these context. Therefore I think movies tell many things about a country. Fair: 17~23 점수: 18 일단 전체적인 구조가 독립형 에세이의 적합하지 않는 구조인거같습니다. 독립형 에세이에서는 인트로 바디 결론으로 나누어져있습니다. 특히 각 구조안에 들어가야하는 적합적인 구조가 있는데 지금 이 에세이는 이러한것 들을 무시하고 있습니다. 특히 결론을 말하는 문장도 없고 요. 또한 각 바디가 구체적인 예시가 빈약해보입니다 주제와 연관된 구체적인 설명이 필요해 보이는 에세이입니다. 수고많으셨습니다.
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