It is commonly believed that many people enjoy internationally introduced products by purchasing them through various ways online, however, it could be argued that these There are some advantages about the globalized business trading. Consumers are getting smarter these days due to the internet (대문자 시작해주시면 됩니다.), hence, they can compare both items which are internationally famous products and the fresh local one. Thanks to these people, suppliers may cut the price to have the price competency, subsequently, market economies can be broadly vigorous since people are willing to buy high-quality items with affordable prices. Another benefit can be that, many people are able to purchase the latest released item at the same time in the world, for instance, electronic devices. Consumers do not have to wait until it arrives in their hometown since the brands run their own branches in many countries such as Apple, Samsung, and LG. However, some people opine that these global companies bring a number of drawbacks on the domestic economy. The first reason is that international products are getting similar as In conclusion, although international market services have many advantages, however, it also has downsides as it may give negative impacts on the domestic market. Therefore, it is significant to note the importance of both markets to preserve it. (이 글은 따로 제언을 요구한 것은 아니고 장단점의 서술만 요구했으므로 결론에서도 장단점을 요약하고 마무리해주시면 됩니다. 항상 목적에 잘 맞도록 신경써주세요!)
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Grammar |
Vocabulary |
Cohesion
and Coherence |
Task
Response |
8/9.0 |
8/9.0 |
8/9.0 |
7/9.0 |
총평: 바로 전 글에서 자잘한 오류와 관련해서 말씀드렸는데, 이번 글 정도로 오류를 줄일 수 있으면 정말 금상첨화일 겁니다. 물론 실전에서 8.0까지 올라가기에는 task1도 있고 해서 조금 어렵겠지만, 그래도 이번 글 한정으로는 결론 정도를 제외하고는 매우 잘 써주셨습니다. 수고하셨습니다 :)
감사합니다.