▶ Your Answer :
The pie chart and table below show information on the types of transportation that the people of Edmonton use and the five main reasons for using motor vehicles in the city.
In terms of the types of transport, 45% of citizens in Edmonton are using cars rather than public transportation, followed by LRT which took up 35% of the total figure. The people who responded that they are using buses and taxis are composed of 20% in total, respectively.
When it comes to the reason for using cars in the urban area, more than half of the people picked 'commute to work'. Adding to that,'business' and 'taking children to school' also held 45% and 40% figure in sequence. The percentages of people who chose 'shopping' and 'leisure activities' as their reason for using cars are only 15% for both figures, respectively.
In conclusion, we can observe that the citizens in Edmonton are quite friendly to using 'car' as their most favored transportation due to its usefulness, mainly in commuting.
Score: 6.5 Comment: 잘 전달을 해주셨습니다. Conclusion 보다는 introduction 뒤에 overview를 써주시면 더 좋을 것 같습니다. 문법상 silly mistakes에 주의 해주시기를 바랍니다. Spelling/article 사용/시제/collocation/에 조금 더 신경을 써주시면 될 것 같습니다. 수고 하셨습니다. |