▶ Your Answer :
The first given
pie chart illustrates the proportion of energy used by Australian households and the
other pie chart depicts the measurement of greenhouse gas emissions are caused
by energy used
In brief, the most
striking point is that the majority of energy is spent for from heating by Australian and that energy accompanies with greenhouse gas by water heating <(little unclear), while the
cooling uses the least energy is used the least energy at household.
In more detail, heating
was accounted for 42 percent to spend energy from Australian houses and water
heating was also possessed at the second top rank with 30 percent. In addition,
other appliances were used 15 percent of energy. Besides, the used energy usage
of refrigeration, lighting and cooling were 7 percent, 4 percent and 2 percent
respectively.
On top of this,
the major emerged greenhouse gas emission came from water heating of 32 percent,
compared to the other appliances of 28 percent. Furthermore, refrigeration and
heating had a similar proportion, all remaining between 14 to 15 percent. Moreover,
the other rest of products could be grouped together as other, taking rest of the factors altogether took up to
about 8 percent.
Score: 6.5 Comment: 잘 전달을 해주셨습니다. 문법과 표현 조금 더 신경을 써주시면 될 것 같습니다. Capitalization/ punctuation/수동태-능동태 활용/표현/에 주로 틀리시고 계십니다. 수고 하셨습니다. |