IELTS Writing 캠브릿지7권 Test3 Task1 / 14.02.07. / 24분52초
The chart illustrates how average house prices had changed in particular cities of five countries between 1990 and 2002 compared with that in 1989. >> 문제와 겹치는 부분이 많아보입니다
The first part of This this graph shows the average percentage changes in between 1990 and 1995 from the figure of in 1989 figure. Madrid(Spain) and Frankfurt(Germany) had the record of plus percentage>> recorded positively 도 좋습니다, with approximately 1% and 2% respectively. However, the house prices of the other cities fell in with the similarly percentage. The figure of New York(USA) recorded minus 5%, while Tokyo(Japan) fell by 7.5% during that period, and which was matched by to London(UK)’s recording result.
In contrast, in second section of this chart, from 1996 to 2002, almost cities had the plus percentage of changing house prices changing , except for Tokyo(Japan). However, Tokyo(Japan)’s falling record rate decreased by 2002. New York(USA) had the exactly same percentage with the 1990 1995 early of 1990s figure, but in plus>> but in plus가 무슨 뜻이죠? 정확히 같은 퍼센트를 기록했는데 이번엔 +란 건가요? 그럼 같은 퍼센티지가 아닌 같은 양의 변화가 있었다고 하셔야 합니다. And 문두에 and also so but or 는 쓸 수 없습니다 During these years, Madrid(Spain) has was almost tripled than before that time, while the percentage of Frankfurt(Germany) was halved.
On the other hand, London(UK) had soared to just over 10% in question, and the gab between first part and the second one was the highest.
Overall, during over two decades, five cities in question had increased in their average house prices compared with that in 1989.
제이님 지난번 첨삭 감사했습니다~~
그때 올린이후로 하루 1개씩 작성하긴했는데 업뎃을 못해서 몰아서 합니다 ㅠㅠ
바쁘신가운데 봐주셔서 정말 감사합니다...
지적사항이 수정이 안되더라도 용서해주세요 한꺼번에 올리는거라..ㅠ
이번에 한꺼번에 올리고 또 수정사항 종합해서 열공하겠습니다...!!
시험 잘보세요~~^^!!!
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감사합니다 시험이 끝나 첨삭을 하나 이상은 할 수 있을 듯 싶습니다
표시해드린 부분 봐주시구요 필요없는 부분은 삭제해드렸고 필요한 부분을 써드렸습니다
문법 봐주시고 괄호해서 나라 안 쓰셔도 됩니다 record란 단어도 너무 많이 쓰였습니다 문법과 단어에서 감점이 많을거라고 예상합니다
Task Achievement - 6
Coherence and Cohesion - 6
Lexical Resource - 5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy - 5
5.5 예상합니다