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As technology is developed, broadcasting system such as television , radio and the Internet>> the 와 대문자 I가 필요합니다 news became common to approach. However, it is possible that broadcasting can give effects to people by choosing what to broadcast on television and what to print in newspapers. 문제에서 따오는건 좋지 않습니다
Normally, we can see various news of sections >> sections of news가 더 좋겠네요 that are composed of lots of articles concerned about politics, economy, society, cultures. Moreover, >> 문장이 길어서 잘라드렸습니다 these have influence on decision of editors.>> 이 문장은 연결이 이상합니다 당연히 영향을 주는 것에 대해서 얘기하는 과정이기도하고 안 말하자니 어색하니 다시 문장을 구성해보시는 것이 좋다고 봅니다 articles에서 끊고 그것들에는 영향을 주는 뭐뭐뭐뭐가 있다가 좋겠네요 In my opinion, >> I think 보다 좋습니다 I think news editors can be influenced by powerful politician. For example, One of the most important time for news editors is the time of new election of president in democratic countries. Lots of>> lots of 보단 a lot of가 낫습니다 lots of 는 구어체에서 쓰기 편하게 만들었다고 들었습니다 people of the countries accept the survey's results about candidates of election by news without prudent thoughts. For this reason some politicians or parties exert their political power to news editors. Of course, >> 부사 전치사 등이 문두로 나오면 콤마로 나눠주세요 it is not desirable situation, but, in this case, people should know what they listened from news might be sometimes not totally true sometimes.
It is interesting that we got used to receive bad news more than good news. This is because news editors has limited time to broadcast and . Furthermore, they should choose more attractive to viewers such as murdering cases , fire cases, and sudden disasters warning people. Even if news editors prefer to broadcast positive news,they cannot consider the response from customers of newspapers and . Unfortunately, they broadcast bad news in order to earn money becuase people don't do not 이라 풀어써주세요 feel interesting from good news.
In conclusion, news editors can get effects be affected by some political power to manage people's mind and get acquire support from them. For this reason, people always >> 빈도부사는 조동사 be동사 뒤 일반동사 앞입니다 had better have critical attitudes when they listen to news always. In addtion, negative news are more common than good news because editors choose more interesting bad news to make people recognize in reality.
마지막 결론은 본문과 조금 다른 듯 싶네요 결론은 현실을 자각하게 하려고인데 본문에선 많은 돈을 벌려고 한다고 쓰여있죠 고쳐주시길 바랍니다 필요없는 말들은 모두 지워드렸습니다 빨간표시 잘 봐주세요
Task Achievement - 6 Coherence and Cohesion - 5 Lexical Resource - 6 Grammatical Range and Accuracy - 5
5.5 예상합니다 |