Your Answer ▼ Nowadays, many negative contents have are shown by the media compared to positive contents. (윗 문장은 문법만 수정해드렸는데 내용이 바뀌어야 합니다. 미디어가 부정적인 사항에 집중하는 현상 자체는 논제에서 전제가 된 사항입니다. 이러한 현상이 과연 좋은 것인지, 그렇지 않은지를 다루는 것이 중요해요.) I definitely agree with this sentence because a lot of people who are immature or lack of experience in life can also access easily to TVs or the Internet.
First of all, the programs about violences or accidents can result in negative effects on individuals. This is because if someone often receives bad information from the media, this person can feel upset, and he or she will hesitate when he or she is supposed to do something. For example, when people watched many news about cases of murder, they might be felt feel dangerous outside. Especially, advertisements about insurance, they usually show how big rate of dangerous how the environment people are living with is dangerous and report the percentage of people getting diseases during a life. Therefore, many people feel annoyed and uncomfortable when they watch like these adverse stories through the media. (Especially 이후 부분도 일단 참고하시라고 문법 쪽 수정은 해드렸지만, 근본적으로 이 내용은 잘못되었습니다. 논제를 보시면 news reports in the media 라고 되어있죠. 그러므로 광고를 다루는 것은 적절하지 않습니다.)
On the other hand Furthermore, it (문단에 처음 등장하는 대상이 대명사로 작성되지 않도록 주의해주세요~) is also harmful for society since the news about bad aspects have lether (??) effects on individuals. To be more specific, if the media shows many of the accidents that occurred at night or where, people would definitely refrain from going there. Then, the area may face economic depressions the area or around the time nobody do outdoor actives, it might reduce economic of the area. In addition, if people get some information about trickery of banks, they will tend to invest money on other places such as housing. As a result, the housing price will rise continually contineuely that most of people could not buy their own house anymore. It means, the economic of the society does not appropriately operate. Therefore, it is clear that when people absorb too much negative informatio,n it has a detrimental effects on society.
Overall, even though the media offers many useful information to people, if the contents can be upset for people, it should be disappeared much of them. This is because these are harmful for both individuals and society. (이게 어떻게 되어야 하는지에 대한 제언을 하는 것이 아니라, 왜 부정적인 영향을 끼치는지에 대해 적어주세요~) |