Some people prefer to work the same type of job throughout their lifetime while others like to change the type of job they do. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
It is considered by some that working the same type of job is more preferable, while others think that making a career change is better. In my opinion, I believe that keeping the same type of work is essential for one’s career performance while trying other areas from time to time.
In modern society, some people tend to have several jobs, which may end up changing their career type. However, there are still a lot of people who stick to have the same type of job in their entire life. Working in the same areas enables people to be more professional. People who have been working in the same areas for more than 10 years can have a wide range of experiences in their job. These countless experiences they have had for a long time make it easy that they can professionally tackle the problem. This is the main reason why people prefer not to change their careers.
On the other hand, some people tend to find a new type of employment even though they currently have a job. Making a career change can increase the possibility for people to find a better job which more fit their personality and ability. By trying different types of jobs, people can learn what kinds of jobs are is good for them or not on their own. Also, those with various types of job experiences could obtain resourceful life skills which allow them to be well-rounded.
Finally, in my opinion, it is vital to keep working the same types of the job while trying new types of employment. People sometimes can be sick of working for the same job for a long time because they have to repeat the same work all the time. On the other hand, changing job types frequently sometimes (두 단어는 서로 충돌합니다. 그러므로 둘 중 하나만 적어주셔야해요.) violate their career performance. Therefore, I believe that trying new areas of job on the side of their main job allows them to maintain their career and refresh themselves from the mannerism. (discuss both 유형에서는 결론과 내 의견은 하나의 문단으로 넣는다고 보시면 됩니다. 지금처럼 서술해도 문제가 있는 건 아닌데, 시간 단축 등을 고려했을 때 하나로 합치고 간추리는 게 나아요.)
In conclusion, working the same types of jobs enables people to be professional while making a career change encourages people to find a more suitable job. Maintaining the main job with trying new things occasionally is the best way to be stable and professional.
총평: (7/7/6/7) 7.0
지금 7점을 드리긴 했으나, 그렇다고 해서 실전에서 7점을 받으신다는 건 아닙니다. 가장 큰 이유는 시간 때문인데, 현재 2시간이면 너무 오래 걸린 축에 속합니다. 이로 인해 이정도의 글이 당장 실전에서 그대로 재현될 가능성은 없다고 보시면 되고요. task 2는 40분 내로는 완성시켜야하므로, 오늘 부터 당장 시간 단축에 돌입해주셔야합니다. 수고하셨습니다 :)
목표는 6.5이고 3주뒤 시험입니다.
2시간걸려 작성했네요.. 첨삭 부탁드리겠습니다. 감사합니다!