Q. Some people say that web content should be used to instruct children. Others think that it is not helpful in an educational setting. Discuss both vieews and give your own opinion.
As there has been a huge technology development in technology globally, using web contents for teaching children became common. It is often said that web content is not necessary and helpful for instructing children as a reason of disturbing for the study, while others are aginst it. This essay will discuss both sides of the statement in detail and provide evidence as to why web contents is better to teach children.
To begin with, opponents of using web contents for teaching children put forward a reason that children are easy to be get (둘 중 하나만 남기시면 됩니다.) interrupted by other websites such as game. Assuming all children each have access to the Internet have each internet system, they may go to other web pages instead of educational website they are supposed to use, due to lack of self-control. Therefore, the efficiency in terms of focusing on study would be low. In fact, there has been a lot of controversaries in South Korea about introducing small internet system for each primary student at school in near future due to this problem, so it is not in the process.
Nevertheless, I believe it is helpful to use web content for teaching children because it increases the effectiveness for memorizing abilities. Web contents such as combination of game and English words help students to increase their memory with fun factors. Therefore, children will get less stress than injecting English words into their brain. Some English academies in Korea introduced this web content for homework since children who memorized the words through web content could remember those for longer times compare to others who memorized them by themselves.
To sum up, while it is true that children are likely to get disturbed by other web pages, it is apparent that it (문단에 처음 등장하는 대상이 대명사로 쓰여서는 안 됩니다. 고로 여기의 경우 web content로 확실히 해주셔야 해요.) helps children to increase their memorizing ability. Therefore, web content for educational purpose is useful for teaching children.
총평: (6/7/6/7) 6.5
이번 글도 크게 문제는 없었습니다. children 이 너무 자주 반복되는 감은 있으므로, Kids, students 등으로 적절히 대체해주시는 게 좋습니다. 그 외의 자잘한 철자 오류에도 신경써주세요!
수고하셨습니다 :)