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The line chart illustrates the amount of fish, salt, >> 세개 이상 항목 중 마지막 and/or 앞엔 콤마입니다 and meat eaten by per person per in a week in China over the period of 25 years, starting from 1985 to 2010.
As seen from the chart, Chinese people in China consumed more plenty of fish more than either meat or salt throughout the period. The amount of fish eaten in 1985 stood at around 600g, while just about 100g of meat was eaten taken by a Chinese person in the same year. Despite of some fluctuations for following 10 years, there was a steady increase in fish consumption of fish, which reached well over 800g in 2010.
In addition, there was a slight rise in the amount of meat consumed as well between 1985 and 2010. It started at 100g in 1985 and doubled in 2010 in spite of a relatively lower level than fish.
On the other hand, the consumption of salt weekly dropped weekly and constantly over the period. In 1985, more or less 500g of salt consumed. However, in 2010, the salt consumption reached to just 200g per week, which was the same figure of meat consumption.
(169)
단순한 line graph 부터 다시 도전해봤는데 어떻게 비교해야할지 애매하네요 ㅠㅠ
Overall로" fish 랑 meat 소비는 증가했는데, salt 소비는 감소했다 " 라고 한번 더 쓰는게 좋을지 모르겠습니다. 결론 쓰는게 좋다고 하셔서 쓰려고했는데... 저런 뻔한 결론이라도 쓰는게 나을지....ㅠ
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문단은 3-4 개로 구성해서 1 서론 1-2 본론 1 결론 형태로 작성해서 결론에서 overall 쓰시면 좋습니다
위에 말씀하신 대로 쓰시면 좋구요 뻔한 결론이라도 그게 맞게 분석된거라면 맞는 결론입니다 대체로 괜찮게 쓰셨지만 오버뷰는 본론 앞쪽에 몰아놓고 써주셔도 좋습니다 밑줄 친 부분들이 오버뷰에 해당되네요
Task Achievement - 7 Coherence and Cohesion - 6 Lexical Resource - 6 Grammatical Range and Accuracy - 6
6.0 예상합니다
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