▶ Your Answer : The bar chart illustrates the amount of minutes of phone calls through three parts in UK between 1995 and 2002. It is measured in minutes (in billions). Overall, the total amount of calls increased significantly as years go by in UK
As to Local - fixed line, it was highest consumption of calls out of the three selected categories over the time period. It started at just over 70 minutes. Then, it rose gradually to 90 minutes in 1999. Whereas, it showed a downward trend afterwards until to 2002. The rate of Local calls in UK stood at just under three quarters in 2002.
Turning to National and International call - fixed line, it comprised about 38 minutes. Then, it went up minimally to 2002. In 2002, it numbered about 72 minutes. The figure for tat of call recorded the second highest reason of consumption of calls. Also, the number of Mobiles(all calls) displayed a appeared similar pattern with National and International calls. It started at about 2 minutes in 1995. After that, the that of rate climbed remarkably until to the end of time the period at just under half. <(under half what?). At the end of the research period, although calls made my mobiles increased substantially, it still marked the lowest minutes of calls made. At the end of the time period, although, that of rate was rised substantially, comparison with others. However, It still recorded lowest reason of consumption of calls in UK.
Score: 5 Comment: 그래프는 잘 이해하신 것 같으신데 전달력이 많이 부족합니다. 기본적인 대문자에 대한 문법 부터, 표현, 전치사, 문장구상, singularity/plurality, 단어 형태 에 틀리시고 계십니다. 내용도 organization이 더 필요합니다. 또한 minutes in billions이기 때문에 표기를 해주실때에는 그저 minutes가 아니라 billion minutes으로 해주셔야합니다. 그 외에는 글 안에 있는 수정을 봐주시면 될 것 같습니다. 수고 하셨습니다. |