Q. Some people think spoken communication
is more powerful than written communication. To what extent do you agree or
disagree with this idea?
Recently, the importance of communication
has become the subject of heated debate. Some people assert that the way of
communicating on their tongue has more strength than writing, while others
argue otherwise. I wholeheartedly agree with the latter stand. In the following
essay, both views will be discussed before a conclusion is reached with my
opinion.
On the one hand, those who claim that
spoken communication is more powerful do so for several reasons. Proponents of
this argument insist that speech give more effective impression. To exemplify,
if the government should announce some countermeasures about social problems,
the public may believe the presentation rather than documents. In addition,
some people think that papers may be forged in incorrect way. Given these
points, some people hold the view that using their tongue in communication is
more forceful. (이 문단에 대해서는 총평에서 말씀드리겠습니다. 참고로 결론적으로는 여기는 written communication 이 더 강한 또다른 이유로 넣어주시면 돼요.)
My opinion, however, is that written
communication has more strength. Perhaps the most compelling reason is that the
document has is more reliability in almost every case. In other words, papers are
able to be maintained for a long time, but speaking cannot be retained as long as they want, but speaking is not retained without
recording. Furthermore, in modern society tend to that communication with
writing is more significant than speech. In fact, some research carried out by
some experts have revealed that documents should be adopted as by evidences in
legal battles. In light of the above, I find these more persuasive.
In conclusion, it is undeniable that there
are a variety of opinions about the topic. However, after considering this
matter in a careful manner, I fully support the view written communication is
more powerful for the reasons discussed above. (물론 템플릿은 이렇게 되어있지만, 가급적이면, 특히 고득점을 위해서라면 그 이유를 요약할 수 있어야 합니다.)
총평: (6/5/7/6) 6.0
일단 올려주신 5개 글 모두 템플릿에 대한 의존도가 매우 큰 것을 확인할 수 있는데, 템플릿 자체가 절대로 나쁜 건 아닙니다. 그러나 분명한 한계점도 있고, 혹시 7.0 이상의 고득점을 목표로 하신다면 웬만하면 템플릿을 아예 버리거나 최소화하면서 나만의 능동적인 글쓰기를 할 수 있어야 합니다. 6.5 목표의 경우도...웬만하면 템플릿은 최소한으로만 쓰는 걸 추천드리긴 하는데, 그래도 여기까지는 어찌저찌 맞춰질 수 있을 거에요. 더군다나 im님의 영어 실력은 꽤 좋은 축에 속하기 때문에, 템플릿은 최소한으로만 쓰더라도 충분히 좋은 문장 만드실 수 있을 겁니다. 문장 암기에는 분명히 감점이 따른다는 점은 명시해주셔야 해요! 그러한 감점을 감수하더라도 6점대의 점수만 필요하시면 템플릿 사용에는 크게 신경쓸 필요 없습니다.
논제에서 to what extent do you agree or disagree? 라고 했으니까, 글에서는 im님의 입장만 다뤄주시면 됩니다. 대비되는 두 입장이 있다고 해서 그걸 무조건 기계적으로 다 넣는 게 아니라, 유형에 따라 적절히 맞춰갈 수 있어야 함에 주의해주세요~자세한 설명은 밑의 링크를 참고해주시면 되겠습니다.
수고하셨습니다 :)
https://www.gohackers.com/?c=ielts/ielts_info2/ielts_method&p=2&type=url&uid=471212