▶ Your Answer : I am totally agree with the opinion that international youth exchange progamme is imposing positive impacts on teenagers due to the following three reasons.<(질문은 negative이냐 positive이냐 이기 때문에 더 positive하다고 해주시면 더 좋을 것 같습니다)
Firstly, we can navigate our young students to the globalized world. By observing and experiencing another culture and society from an early age, our teenagers will be inspired through this international exchange programme. Adding to that, the sensitiveness to the other cultures and globalization can allow give our next generations to cultivate a competitiveness to get on <(?) in this globalized society.
Secondly, international exchange visits can contribute to the world peace. The on-going conflicts between nations and different religion-based countries are not easy to be solved due to the reason that our already settled concepts on our own thing<(what?) is not easy to be converted. Thus, the tolerance and respect to the other nations, cultures and religions should be learned from an early age. In that manner, youth exchange visit between countries has a huge possibility of embedding a seed of peace for the better world with mutual affection.
Lastly, it is really hard to find the negative impact of international exchange visits on our students. If this programme is properly funded by the government or big firms, and if the applying process is open to every student without any kinds of discrimination, there is no reason to hesitate, encouraging our children to joining the programmes. What we should care about are the possible safety problems including diseases and the way for maximizing the positive impact of exchange visits after the programme is over.
In conclusion, the international exchange visit for teenagers can give a proper guidance to them in a globalized world with possible growing ability to cope with possible conflict between countries if we can prepare for the unexpected accidents and effective use of this programme.
Score: 7 Comment: 내용이 좋다고 생각합니다. 다만 silly mistakes에 너무 많습니다. Spelling에 주의 해주시기를 바랍니다. 글을 쓰신 후 꼭 1~2번 proofreading을 해주셔서 spelling mistakes나 silly mistakes를 고쳐주시기를 바랍니다. 수고 하셨습니다. |