IELTS Writing 캠브릿지8권 Test1 Task1 / 140210 / 19분15초
The figures illustrate the two informational parts. The first one pie chart shows the reasons of land degradation on in the worldwide, while the second table shows 앞에와 동사를 똑같이 쓰는건 좋지 않습니다 the effect of that causes on three regions, North America, Europe and Oceania during the 1990s.
In the first part of these figures, we can see that there is a third of less productive land >> 어색한 문장입니다 (3분의 1의 더 적은 비옥한 땅이 있다) caused by deforestation. And this percentage is almost similar to that of over-cultivation, with 28 per cent. Overgrazing >> 붙여주세요 was the most biggest proportion of the reasons with over 1 in 3 of total pie >> 3개의 pie 중 1개 초과 너무 어색한 표현이네요, while others were relatively unsignificant.
In the second part, it is illustrated that how these reasons affected several continents is illustrated. The dominant total land degraded >> The degradation of land was dominant in Europe is on Europe , while almost half of that proportion on Oceania Oceania accounted for more or less half of it. In contrast, North America recorded only five per cent of degraded land degraded, which is just under 1 in out of 4 of that in Europe.
Similarly in causes, the greatest proportions of deforestation and over cultivation are occurs in Europe, with 9.8% and 7.7% respectively. But Oceania has a significant recording on overgrazing at 11.3%, and that is almost ten times as likely as that of North America. The Other two factors are very small percentage on that region.
Overall, the worldwide land degradation has the three main causes. And three regions in question have respectively effects from those reasons.
급하다보니 이렇게 염치불구하고 연속적으로 올립니다...ㅠㅠ
정말 감사합니다... 제이님도 시험공부 잘하셔서 원하는 결과 꼭 얻으시길...!!
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같은 실수가 반복되네요 또한 전에 에세이 쓰신 분량과 이 글을 볼 때 시험장에 가셔서 분량 채우실 수 없으십니다
Task1 이나 Task2 둘 중 하나의 분량을 줄이길 바라지만 전 Task1 을 줄이시길 원합니다
Task Achievement - 6
Coherence and Cohesion - 6
Lexical Resource - 5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy - 5
5.5 예상합니다