▶ Your Answer :
These two maps indicate the alternation of a certain island before and after some tourist facilities are is built, measured in metres.
Overall, it can be clearly seen that there are a range of changes in the island on the figures for housings, roads, and attractions to enjoy and to stay at this island which has longer width than length.
As is shown by the buildings, after (an action of) renovation, 15 small houses are built for accommodation made up to accommodate, which are divided into two circles, 6 accommodations on the right side of the island and 9 on the left. making circle divided two areas, the right 6 and left 9 respectively. Along with the accommodation, a the foot path is constructed and it follows toward the beach.<(be more specific) Furthermore, the other buildings including a new tourist facilities also include restaurant and a reception, which give visitors conveniences, are located in the middle of this island.
In terms of attractions, people who travel to this island can start a tour from a pier, which looks like the alphabet 'T' in the southern part <(southern part of what?). At this place, they are able to play yachts.<(you can't play yachts. you can go on yachts) From the pier, by passing the linked vehicle tracks, which continue to reception and restaurant, and choosing the left connected foot paths, people can find a beach where they are able to swim. <(run-on sentence. 또한 조금 복잡하게 설명해주셨습니다. 지도인 만큼 쉽게 그냥 west side of the island에는 수영할수 있는 공간이 만들어졌다 라고 하시면 됩니다)
Score: 5 Comment: 시제는 after construction과 비교를 하는 것이기 때문에 과거형을 써주시는게 좋습니다. 그리고 무언가가 지어진 후 이기 때문에 그저 renovation/construction 후에는 뭐뭐가 어디에 생겼다 라고 해주시면 됩니다. 내용 정리를 조금 더 해주시면 좋을 것 같습니다. 정보가 조금 복잡하게 설명되는 경우도 있습니다. 지도 이기 때문에 south/north/east/west 로 써주시면 됩니다. 또한 specificity에 조금 더 신경을 써주시면 좋을 것 같습니다. 수고 하셨습니다.
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