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Nowadays,
having instant foods is more preferred over cooking dishes by people and there
are both negative and positive factors about eating ready-made foods. I
personally believe that the benefits of eating instant foods outweigh the drawbacks.
On one hand, it is
true that ready to eat foods are not so much healthy in terms of nutrition than
the homemade foods. Instant foods are the products made by food companies which
manufacture them in mass production in automated factories. The reason they are
unhealthy is that in the manufacturing process, the ingredients used to make
these products are low-quality and not fresh. In addition, companies add a
significant amount of additives to preserve their foods longer, which are
harmful if absorbed, so that it can be consumed by more people. (개인적으로 저는 여기 어순을 다르게 썼을 것 같은데, 현재 어순이 문제가 있다기보다는 취향의 차이에 가깝긴 해서 그냥 두겠습니다. 저도 글 내에 따로 표시해드릴 내용이 많지 않아서 이걸 체크한 것이기도 하고요.) However, normal
people are numb to these facts about processed foods.
Nevertheless, the
reason why I argue that ready-made foods might have more advantages than
disadvantages is that the convenience they provide to people is so huge that
they offset the unhealthiness of manufactured foods. (목표달성님은 그냥 스킵하시면 되고, 이 글을 읽으시는 다른 수험생분들 참고해주세요! 여러분들께서 outweigh 유형을 어려워하시는 경우가 많은데, 지금 문장이 장점이 단점을 outweigh 하는 것을 보여주는 핵심이 됩니다. 단순히 장단점만 적고 결론에서 '장점이 많아~' 이런 식으로 적는 게 아니라, 최소 지금 문장 정도는 갖출 수 있어야 해요.) Today people’s preference towards
instant foods would be explained by the fact that people can save their time
and labor by eating them which otherwise would have been spent on making their
own meals. In fact, most people who have jobs cannot afford enough time to prepare
their own dishes and it is this busy-working trend in current society that has contributed
to the popularity of instant foods among people.
To conclude, I believe
that disadvantages of ready to eat foods are smaller than the benefits coming
from convenience of eating them. (장점 정도는 무엇이 있었는지에 간단하게 요약해주세요. 길 필요는 없고, 0.3문장 정도면 충분합니다.) |