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It is widely accepted that having diverse experiences in school is one of the important part of education. Some people claim that doing as many activities as possible in high school should be enhanced, (파란 부분은 총평을 확인해주세요~)while others think that school have to focus students have to focus on their academic educations. I agree with the former opinion and will discuss the specific reasons on this essay. Firstly, social activities provide plenty of experiences which can not be absorbed by books. In other worlds, being involved with involving the community’s problems and doing conative task on their own can help/make them realize what they should truly persuade for their society. (원래 동명사 주어로써 단수동사를 쓰는데 and로 연결되면 이경우엔 복수동사를 써야하나요? 아닙니다 그냥 realize 로 가주시면 돼요~) for example, in Korea, since 2016 the government announce one project named of ‘ free-semester’ to all high school students. The program encourage more student engage with social activities such as caring elderly people, delivering necessaries of life to poor family. (encourage 와 compulsory 는 전혀 다릅니다.) Second of all, It (문단에 처음 등장하는 대상을 대명사로 작성해서는 안 되고, 대소문자 구분에도 신경써주세요~) enhances student’s morality. To specify, the more students participate in those kind of social programs, the more generous their minds grow well. It makes students to live a have valuable life and to get meaningful opportunity to learn something new. For example, the department of education in Korea, they regulate regulated student’s volunteer activities by law in laws. Student have to spend time over 15 hours during high school. If they can not do these tasks, they might struggle to graduate. (morality 와 연관지어주세요~) In conclusion, personally, I agree all types of high school social programs should be execrated for students. This is because Because learning ‘social-knowledge’ and having a valuable life are important extremely important no more than anything are extremely important. *제가 논제에 compulsory의 의미를 몰라서 유추되는대로 썼는데 오프토픽까진 아니었을까요 ㅠㅠ?
오프토픽까지는 아니더라도, 그렇다고 아예 논제와 완전히 일치한다고 볼 수도 없습니다. 참고로 '필수적' 이라는 뜻인데, 초록 부분이 이와 연관되어있습니다!
채원
항상 감사합니다 :) |