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안녕하세요 제임스님~확실히 아침에 운동갈 때 날씨가 많이 추워진 것을 느낍니다. 제임스님도 건강 조심하세요!
The three pie charts below show the percentage of US online music service users from five age groups in 2013, 2015, and 2017.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The three pie charts illustrate the portion of online music service users by five different American age groups in 2013, 2015, and 2017.
Overall, it is noticeable that users of two age groups which are 20-29, and 30-39 age users accounted for approximately a half in the chart over the period. Besides, the largest age group using online music service fluctuated during the same period.
In 2013, the 40-49 age group showed 34 percent as the highest position, followed by 31 percent for the 30's user group in their 30's. However, the highest percentage of user group throughout the period changed as the 30-39 age group had 33 percent in 2015, and the 20-29 age group accounted for 34 percent in 2017. Over 50 ages recorded 12 percent Those in their 50s and over took 12 percent of the total in 2013, but it decreased regularly, to 11 percent in 2015, and 4 percent in 2017, respectively. On the other hand, the youngest age group, 10-19 ages, had a rapid increase from 4 percent in 2015 to 24 percent in 2017. (words 160)
총평: (7/7/6/6) 6.5
분석 자체는 task2에서 내용을 잘 써주시는 것과 마찬가지로 잘 해주셨습니다. 이것만으로도 어느정도 점수는 벌어가겠지만, 사실 영어의 측면, 즉 어휘+문법에서는 약간씩 아쉬운 부분이 보입니다. 어휘+문법은 한버 다져놓으면 그때부터는 상수가 되므로 (내용은 항상 변수입니다. 심지어 제임스님처럼 [한국어]작문을 잘 하는 학생들의 경우에도 그래요.) 여기는 글쓰기와 별개로 꼭 다져주세요!
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