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When choosing a job, the salary is the most
important consideration for many. Others, however, prefer different other
aspects of a job over the salary they earn. In your opinion what are the most important
aspects of a job? |
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Many
people might have inclined the notion that high income is the most significant
element when applying (이렇게 쓰면 1인칭 없이도 문장을 구성할 수 있죠.) First
and foremost, numerous people nowadays might consider that the personal
achievement far outweighs good monthly payments (직업 선택을 고려했을 때~라고 적어주시는 게 더 정확합니다.). Although they might be paid
lesser money than that of people who work for the behemoth, their accomplishments
in the business may bring scores of values to workers. For Secondly,
some people might expect other respects which apart from businesses, and I
feel that one can be learning foreign languages. Some people choose to join companies
which are located at overseas to improve their language skills. By living in other
nations, people might be immersed into the different cultures and surroundings.
Thus, they are able to familiarize themselves with practical, business, and professional foreign languages. In addition, thanks to the extraordinary experience,
those people are able to pursue enhanced job positions in other firms or individual
fulfillments may change their mindsets in an optimistic way. In
condensation, even though the remunerative work position is considered as a substantially
tempting factor that makes candidates to apply for the company, I am firmly convinced
that the employees’ desire to the contribution for the company and personal achievements
might offer positive impacts on the workers regardless of high income. |
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[ 304 words] |
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Grammar |
Vocabulary |
Cohesion and Coherence |
Task Response |
8/9.0 |
8/9.0 |
8/9.0 |
8/9.0 |
감사합니다.
총평: 이번 글은 최대한 짜게 잡아서 8.0이었습니다. 중간에 대소문자 오류가 유일한 흠이었네요. 그만큼 좋은 글입니다.
수고하셨습니다 :)