▶ Your Answer :
It is true that a numerous of individuals
go to overseas to study in an early age. Studying in other countries can be
beneficial for those people, but I think it has more drawbacks for students and
their parents while studying in foreign countries.
In general, young learners can adapt to the
global language ,which is English, faster than others who are struggling with
speaking a second language in home countries. In addition, the quality of
courses in foreign countries is usually better than home countries. For instance,
fashion design schools in New York and France are well known to many people and
the institutions released various fashion designers. Therefore, people who want
to get a qualification about it<(what is it ?) they are willing to go to overseas to study
better quality courses. Moreover, there will be a possibility to have an
opportunity of getting jobs in a large organization. In my country, employers
prefer to select their employees who have a certified degree from overseas.
On the other hand, studying abroad can lead
to some difficulties on both learners and their parents. It is obvious that
young students feel lonely after separating from their family and friends
as they cannot see them anymore whenever they want. Another thing is that
students have to care about their expenses, which means they cannot be dependent
on their parents. Therefore, to save some money, they need to do some part-time
work to pay electricity bills, rent payments and bus tickets even though they
do not want to. Lastly, students’ parents are responsible for paying a great
amount of tuition fee after sending their children to abroad. Normally, the
cost of the whole course payment is triple of that of their than home country, so parents cannot
avoid this matter, and it can be more stressful to teach their children.
In conclusion, in my opinion, the
individual students and parents can be in a difficult situation with studying in
abroad. Instead of learning a course of study in overseas, parents can
encourage their children to study in their home country for the reasons I mentioned
above.
Score: 7.5 Comment: 잘 서술 해주셨습니다. 문법상 전치사 사용에 조금 더 신경을 써주시면 좋을 것 같습니다. 그 외에는 글 안에 있는 수정을 봐주시면 될 것 같습니다. 수고 하셨습니다.
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