마지막입니다! 감사합니다
The plans illustrate how a public park has
developed from 1920, which is its first opening year, to today. Overall,
the area has witnessed significant changes in the use of land over
the given periods. The park has two entrances and one of them is from
Arnold Avenue side and the other one is from Eldon Street side, which have
not been changed. (Overview에서는 큰 그림에서의 변화를 다뤄주시면 되고, 이 내용은 세부 분석에 더 어울립니다. 참고로 여기의 Overview에서는, '레크리에이션, 엔터테인먼트를 위한 다양한 시설들이 추가로 들어왔으며, 조금 더 중앙 정돈화되었다~' 이런 식으로 작성해주시면 돼요.)
Turning first to the main changes, in
the middle of the park, there was a big fountain in 1920 but today it is
replaced by a new rose garden surrounded by seats. On the west side of park,
there was a stage for musicians which has been enlarged to an amphitheatre Amphitheatre for
concerts.
In case of the east side, although they are
changed respectively to café, play area for children and a water feature today,
there were a rose garden, pond for water plants and glass house when the park
was first opened. Furthermore, seating areas were scattered over the
park at first, but they are more focused in the middle now. Lastly, original
rose gardens have disappeared except only one of them. (그 하나에 대해 간략히 언급해주시면 되는데, 여기의 경우 윗 문단과 연관지어주시면 되겠습니다.)
총평: (6/7/7/7) 7.0
이번 글은 어휘 쪽에서도 크게 문제 없이 잘 써주셨습니다. 대신 내용 쪽 약~~간의 문제는 있는데, Overview 작성과 관련해서는 링크를 넣어드릴테니 확인해주세요! 표 문제 관련 내용이지만 본질은 지도에도 똑같이 적용됩니다.
또한, 동서남북 방향표시는 동서남북이 실제로 지도에 주어져있는 경우에만 쓰는 게 원칙이긴 하니까 이것도 참고해주세요~물론 엄청난 감점은 없습니다만...그래도 표에 충실하는 게 최대한 좋긴 합니다.
수고하셨습니다 :)
https://www.gohackers.com/?c=ielts/ielts_info2/ielts_story&p=2&type=url&uid=469784