is inevitable that traditional cultures will be lost as technology develops. Technology and traditional cultures are incompatible. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?
Recently, lots of techologies are growing in various parts instead of traditional cultures. Some people say that technologies and traditions do not share the same places. Personally, (안 넣어도 문법상 문제는 없습니다. 그러나 넣으면 확실히 더 매끄럽게 이어져요.) I totally agree with the view and will present reasons for my belief.
One reason that supports my view is that convenience of technologies is higher than traditions. This is because the process of private works changes to a minimum minimal. For example, there are traditions that individuals visit to their parent's home to meet their family in New Years Day and Thanksgiving (이건 그냥 암기하세요!) New years day and Thanks giving day and so on. As the video call is advanced through the messengers such as KakaoTalk (참고로 이건 점수에 전혀 영향 없습니다. 그냥 참고하시라고만 고쳐드린 거에요.) Kakaotalk, people do not need to go to their parent's house and check out parent's conditions. These advanteges apply to both young generation that consider convenience important and old generation which want to see their family frequently.
Another reasons is that traditions make those who are young isolated. This is because these cultures became major part for the elderly. Precisely, Korean traditional markets have characteristics, which includes paying only cash in cheap price and receiving larger amount of products. Meanwhile, young people prefer to pay with a as credit card and gain a cash recepit. In traditional markets, these requirements are refused due to the cheap not expensive price. Some dealers require higher costs and give young consumers correct amount of items since they neglect young purchasers. Therefore, traditions have boundaries that young people can not contact and understand.
In conclusion, I think that traditions and technologies are incompatible because technologies enable short process about private works and traditions want to protect their own boundaries.
총평: (7/7/7/7) 7.0
이번 글 괜찮았습니다. 간만에 task2에서 칭찬을 드리는 것 같은데, 그렇다고 하더라도 GRA는 채점관에 따라 6점까지는 내려갈 수 있으므로 문법은 꾸준히 해주시면 되겠습니다.
서론 마지막 줄은 제가 msg쳐드린 것이긴 한데, 웬만하면 반영해주세요! 크게 어렵지는 않을 겁니다.
수고하셨습니다 :)