Should we hold on to the old when
innovations are available, or should we simply move forward?
The advent of James Nachtwey’s photographs
has grown the awareness of the public about the conflicts and bad aspects of
society. James Nachtwey has documented almost every major conflicts in the
world since 1981. In 2003, he was injured by a grenade during an attack on his
convoy in Baghdad. Before passing out from his wound, however, he continued to
take pictures of injured soldiers and medics around him. As a founder of VII
Photo Agency, which promotes the use of photography to alleviate social issues,
Nachtwey continues to use his photographs to inspire the viewers to fight
against the sufferings caused by civil strife and alleviate social burdens,
including, most recently, those caused most recently by HIV and AIDS. James Nachtwey totally
adapted his own way of photography usage, which was rather different from those
of other photographers, and encourage the public to fight against the pejorative
social norms. Thus, Nachtwey’s examples prove that in order to reduce the bad
impact of society., one should attempt different ways.
Mohammad (이걸로 감점이 크게 들어가는 건 절대 아니긴 한데, Muhammad 가 맞습니다. 그냥 참고로만 알아두세요~) Yunus established the Grameen bank
and used micro-lending to help people in Bangladesh. Mohammad Yunus established
the Grameen Bank in 1983, fuelled by the belief that credit is a fundamental
human right. His objective was to help poor people escape from poverty by
providing loans on terms suitable to them and by teaching them some sound
financial principles so they could health themselves. From Dr Yunus’ personal loan
of small amount of money to desperate basket-weavers in the mid-90s in Bangladesh,
the Grameen Bank advanced to the forefront of a burgeoning world movement
towards eradicating poverty through micro-lending. Replicas of the Grameen Bank
now exist in more than 100 countries worldwide. Yunus also accepted different kinds
of way to reduce poverty in Bangladesh. Therefore, it is evident that one
should pursue innovation and different methods to reduce social burdens.
To summarize 혹은 기타 등등, the The examples of James Nachtwey, Paul Famer
and Mohammad Yunus all suggest that one should attempt to seek new ways in
order to deal with current issues and conflicts in the world.
비밀번호는 1234 입니다!
총평: 일단 영어 자체에는 거의 문제가 없다고 보셔도 무방합니다. 저 o -> u 를 틀린다고 감점이 쎄게 들어가는 것도 아니고요.
대신 아이엘츠가 아닌 것 같아서 딱히 상관은 없지만, 만약에 아이엘츠가 맞았다면, 이정도의 글을 40분내로 쓰는 건 아무리 봐도 불가능하기 때문에 지금과 비교해서 훨씬 간추려주셔야 하며, 또한 예시 일변도의 글에서도 어느정도는 탈피해주셔야 합니다.
수고하셨습니다 :)