Comment ▼
It is true for people throughout the world
to think that being a polyglot can derive a number of positive impacts on their
future. I firmly agree with this statement for a couple of significant reasons.
Being proficient in having a command of
speaking a foreign language not a mother tongue, to begin with, (굳이 지금처럼 어순을 꼬아쓰실 필요가 있나 싶습니다.) can show people who can
use diverse languages are very competitive people compared to whom cannot. As
for a job seeking, owners of companies which require employees to go to other
countries to contact with them or conduct business written in other tongues
prefer to hire bilinguals. In fact, a number of enterprises in Korea such as
Samsung or LG give preference to job seekers who can utilize many languages
because they would implement many works based on other languages perfectly,
showing them learning diverse language can give better opportunities to be
hired.
Furthermore, people can directly experience
other nations’ culture and practices even more directly when they are good at
speaking the tongues because they can have a conversation with people in other
countries. Visitors can enjoy traveling from a local perspective, not from a
foreigner’s point of view due to the fact that travelers can get information
based on native people. For example, in book “Jump to the world”, the author
said that he could experience Chinese cultures in detail because he heard
informative travel information from his Chinese friends. (이거는 앞에서 했던 말에 중국이랑 책이름이라는 고유명사만 붙여서 반복하는 것에 지나지 않습니다. 별로 좋은 전개는 아니에요.) This shows that
learning other nation’s countries can give extra-ordinary experiences to the
people.
In light of the aforementioned factors,
learning overseas languages has is affirmative impacts on particular situations
such as trip to other countries and finding a job.
총평: (6/7/7/7) 7.0
성현님은 문법에서 강점을 가지고 계시고, 어휘도 막 약하거나 그러지는 않습니다. (물론, 개인적으로는 어휘에서 조금 더 힘을 빼라고 권유해드리고 싶긴 합니다.) 이 둘이 안정적이기 때문에 어느정도 점수는 벌어가겠지만, 내용 자체, 특히 각 본론의 후반부를 쓰시는 것과 관련해서는 조금 오락가락할 때가 있어요. 예시 등을 어떻게 써야할지 고민하기보다, 아예 예시 없이 가는 것도 괜찮은 선택입니다. 이와 관해서는 제가 위에 말씀드린 두 학생의 글을 참고해보세요!
(대신 위의 두 학생들처럼 쓰려다가 도저히 안 되겠으면 그냥 지금처럼 쓰셔도 됩니다. 자기에게 안 맞는 걸 억지로 적용할 수는 없으니까요.)
수고하셨습니다 :) |