Some people think that in order to produce a happy society, it is necessary to ensure that there is only a small difference between the earnings of the richest and poorest. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In a capitalistic society, money might be the one of elements related to happiness. Many people want to earn a lot of money as possible as they can and some people show off their wealth. More and more people want to be rich and crimes related to money are increasing on modern society. Thus, I think a small difference between the earnings of the richest and poorest can make a happy society. This essay will provide the reasons.
First of all, the gap
between the rich and poor is becoming
larger and larger. Only
few people make more money than sum of wealth that the majority make that others make money. This difference
makes people feel uncomfortable. Some rich people show off their wealth on SNS
and many people compare their circumstances with the rich people. As a result, they
become unhappy. People know knows that money is not everything in their lives but it
is clear that money is important to live especially in capitalistic society.
Thus, they cannot help comparing with others and it might related to their
happiness.
Also, it (문단에 처음 등장하는 대상이 대명사로 쓰여서는 안 됩니다.) can prevent that people from trying to get high-income jobs. Recently, many students
prefer only few departments which they can get high-income jobs easily. If
society ensures a small difference between the income of the richest and
poorest, young people can challenge what they like with no worries about income
and it can develop various fields. Thus, the smaller the gap of earnings, the
more people can challenge without worries about money.
In conclusion, a small gap between the earning of the richest and poorest can produce a happy society. It can people feel free from money and eventually helpful for society.
총평: (7/6/7/6) 6.5
새로운 문단을 쓰실 때에는, 새로운 글을 쓴다고 생각하시면 됩니다. 고로 처음 나오는 친구들은 모조리 그게 뭔지를 밝혀주시면 돼요. 그렇지 않을 경우 asdfghjkl님만 그게 뭔지를 알게 되기 때문에 독자들과 채점관들을 배려하지 못하게 됩니다.
수고하셨습니다 :)