Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree?
There are divergent opinions regarding the issue of whether people nowadays have enough options to choose. Even though there are some people who insist that more developments and inventions must be made in order to increase the number of choices, I firmly believe that we are having more options than what we actually need.
These days, unemployment rates the rate of unemployment is are constantly increasing and having too many options in the job market is one of the biggest factors that cause people to face challenges when it comes to choosing a career. Unlike older generations, younger people have the privilege of having different experiences in diverse work fields as the advancement of the Internet and broadcasting system has developed significantly, allowing people to be more aware of various industries that are difficult to find in their environment. For instance, most university students in China desire to leave their country for better job opportunities abroad because a number of documentary programs and movies describe working overseas, especially in the United States, as the most effective way to be satisfied with the income and the career. As a result, younger generations are more likely to be exposed to many other options of careers than the previous generations, resulting in difficulties for them to decide what career path they should would pursue.
On top of that, it is acknowledged that exporting and importing goods are one of the essential economic activities for both developed and developing countries. Through this, people are world-widely having opportunities to try exotic foods all over the world. As a result, every individual in modern society spends a significant amount of time deciding which foods or ingredients they would like to purchase. For example, in South Korea, there are more than five large corporations that produce dairy products and display them at every grocery store they could find, which leads customers to spend more time choosing which products are more suitable for their family. This example clearly explains that citizens in contemporary society are experiencing too many options even in terms of choosing what they would want to consume.
To conclude, although there are some people who argue that there are not enough choices provided to people in modern society, I firmly believe that every individual has a number of options to choose as their careers and experiences an overwhelming number of choices even when it comes to purchasing groceries. (여기의 경우 조금 더 '부정' 의 뉘앙스로 바꿔주시면 됩니다. ckang20님 실력이면 알아서 잘 바꾸실 거라 따로 댓글로 검사받으라고 말씀드리지는 않을게요.)
소요시간: 40분
목표점수: 7.0
아이디어 정리가 너무너무 힘들어요 혹시 제글 앞뒤가 너무 안맞고 바보같은느낌이 많이드나요?ㅠ
총평: (7/8/7/8) 7.5
이정도면, 적어도 7.0 선에서는 아이디어 정리를 충분히 잘 해주신 편입니다. ckang20님의 경우 실력은 정말 좋으신데, 이에 비해 자신감이 약간 없으신 것 같다는 점이 조금 아쉬워요. 게시판에 있는 학생들 중 거의 2~3등을 다투시니까 충분히 자신감 갖고 쓰셔도 됩니다! 7.0은 무조건 넘기고, 7.5냐 아니냐가 관건일 거에요.
수고하셨습니다 :)