Q. Some educational experts say that children have to do homework. However, others say
that homework does more harm than good.
Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Many people believe that children learn responsibility by homework. Nevertheless, there are some people who believe that homework gives a negative image to children because of its pressure. This issue is contentious because it combines positive factors such as learning responsibility with negative elements like a pressure.
Firstly, some people assert that a homework makes a negative cognition about study. It is well-known fact that children lose an interest on learning as they do their assignments with a pressure. For example, teachers can give a positive cognition about study throughout videos or plays during the classes. As this shows, it is necessary to make children study with their own will encouraging their attentions. Therefore, it is evident that homework gives pupils makes students to get a bad impression about study.
Moreover However, some experts believe that through homework, children can learn responsibility of duty including a knowledge. This is because doing homework is a student's duty Because, it is doing student’s duty to finish their homework. Many experts say that children learn the responsibility by performing the given work even if they don’t (줄임말은 풀어써주세요~) find it interesting. For instance, it is inevitable to do works which are not attempting in the future. This clearly illustrates that having responsibility of obligation is necessary to children for a long term view. For these reasons, I believe that children have to do homework. Homework is not only a method for an education but also a series of duty that our society demands in a future.
To sum up, it is clear that there are many advantages of homework to children because it is a chance to learn a sense of responsibility. However, there are also significant drawbacks because homework often gives a negative image to children.
첨삭 감사합니다:)
총평: (7/6/6/6) 6.5
빨간 부분이 그렇게 많지는 않은 것을 통해 보실 수 있듯이 최소한 이게 틀렸다! 라고 할 수 있는 부분이 많은 건 아니었습니다. 그러나 children 단어의 반복 등에서는 약간 아쉬운 부분이 있었기 때문에 이에 주의해주세요!
수고하셨습니다 :)