▶ Your Answer :
. Some
people might think that it is better to spend time with one or two close
friends than with many friends. I, however, strongly insist that it is more
beneficial to hang out with a large number of friends than one or two close
friends based on the following reasons.
To begin with, a broad
relationship provides a wider world to someone. People are so different from
individual to individual that various friends give more diverse life
experiences, thus broadening one’s perspective. For instance, I was a member of
a rock band club during college. Even though I majored in Classical Chinese
Literature during college, I could hang out with different major friends
from different majors through the club
activities. Every time when I met the club members, they told me about the a
diversity of the world and emphasized the importance of English so that I could
spend a gap year in the United States, studying English and traveling around
the western countries. From this present, there is no student or scholar who
can speak and read academic English, given the fact that classical Chinese
areas only focuses on China. By means of this oversea experience, now I
work as an international scholar who can translate classical Chinese
literatures into English. Without the club member’s advices, I would not have
had such a broader world.
On top of that, having many
friends gives an opportunity to hang out
with them more often. People have a limited time, thus being unable to spend
time with their friends every single minute. Especially, after getting a job,
it is almost impossible to drink a beer every night with a same friend. Thus,
if a person has a narrow relationship, he or she has few opportunities to enjoy
their his life with friends. For
instance, James Kim, my friend, enjoys playing a basketball. Given the
fact that he has a few friends, he complains
that it is really hard to find a partner when he wants to play a
basketball. On the contrary, Jane You, my academic advisor who has frequently a
business trips, goes to the mountain
with her friend whenever she wants. Since she has many friends, it is easy to
make a schedule and enjoy climbing mountains when she is free.
To sum up, people who have broaden relationships can not only broaden their
life sphere but also enjoy their hobby more often. In this respect, it is
better to have a wide relationship than a narrow relationship.
Writing
0-30 Score Scale |
Good (24-30) |
Score |
24 |
Overall
Comment: |
문법 오류는 위 지적사항들을
참고하세요. 예시도 좋고 포인트도 잘 잡으셨습니다. 설득력이 좋았지만 다만 아쉬운 점은 문법 오류가 너무 많다는 점입니다. 수고하셨어요. |
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