▶ Your Answer :
Nowadays, conflicts between people occur much more than before. There are some people just stands the circumstance, while others just express their opinions and feelings. So, it is debatable whether being patient is a good way or not. Personally, I strongly believe that it is beneficial to make a better result in modern society that is a lot more competitive and complex. As it allows to improve work efficiency and accept diversity, being patient will play a significant role to live a successful life in modern society.
First of all, being patient will increase work efficiency a lot. To be specific, there are a lot of uncomfortable cases happening when we work for a goal. If we successfully overcome the inconvenience, it is possible to finish the work. In other words, the People who lacked patience are likely to give up to solve the problem, not being able to approach the goal at all. However, if someone with a persevere enough, he or she will conquer the game and successfully achieve the goal, overcoming the hardship. For example, I have a friend who hates the noise. During the exam period, he could not stand for hearing noises around and just gave up to study for the test. Consequently, he cannot get the score which he desired. This example shows that being patient and deal with the problem more wisely is essential to reach the goal. (참을성 있게 기다려서 어려움을 극복한 뒤 긍정적인 결과를 낳은 경우 또한 적어주세요)
In addition, being patient plays a key role to be opened to diversity. To be specific, it is important to be patient when we have to understand others ideas or different culture. Since others are not as same as myself, I have to tolerate some difficulties to completely understand them. For example, we can think about traveling. In other places, people feel a lot of inconvenience on the food because it does not match much with their own culture. However, since the world becomes more globalized, we have to learn more about other customs to broaden my perspective. Being patient will bring better understanding for others, which is vital to change my viewpoint. Thus, it is safe to argue that being patient makes a good result for my personality. (참을성을 통해 어떻게 다양성에 open된 태도를 갖출 수 있게 하는지 구체적으로 적어주세요: 다른 문화 차이를 불평하기 보단 받아들인다, 예) 타국에서 음식 때문에 불편했으나 이를 이해하면서 그 나라의 다양성을 이해할 수 있게 되었다: 구체적인 국가명 및 구체적인 예시를 적어주세요)
In conclusion, being patient has a lot of benefits in developing work efficiency and broadening one's perspective. Therefore, I firmly asserts that being patient is essential to live in modern society.
Writing 0–30 score scale: Limited (1-16) / Fair (17-23) / Good (24–30)
ADDRESSING TOPIC
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ORGANIZATION
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PROGRESSION AND COHERENCE
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LANGUAGE USE
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GRAMMAR
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FAIR
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FAIR
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LIMITED
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FAIR
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FAIR
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각 카테고리별 SCORE: LIMITED / FAIR / GOOD
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