▶ Your Answer :
The reading passage contends that there are
a couple of advantages to increasing special tax on tobacco. On the other
hands , the lecture brings up several points that contradict this argument.
First, the lecturer argues that increasing
the tax has no impact on young people’s smoking. This is because the more
number of most of young people could buy it in the black market. The research says that
the higher revenue of tobacco is, the bigger more black markets are is. Actually,
smugglers sold cigarettes at a cheap price and do not check their age, so young people buy
it although it is illegal. 세금을 올려도 어린 학생들은 블랙마켓에서 사기 때문에 소용 없다는 내용이 핵심이므로 표시한 문장은 딱히 요약에 꼭 필요한 내용은 아닌 것 같아요. 없애도 괜찮을 것 같습니다. This casts doubt on the reading passage’s claim that raising
the tax on tobacco will reduce that the number of young people will start smoking.
Second, according to the lecture, higher
tax is not beneficial benefit to the environment. The reason is that the less amount number of tobacco is sold because of its higher price. Therefore, few people want to buy it and
sales volume will be reduced. It would also decline the whole revenue of cigarettes.
Thus, government could not implement their policy of providing the environment. 내용 더 간단하게 줄여주세요. This refutes the reading passage’s assertion that a higher tax will help the
government lessen damage on the environment.
The final point by the lecturer is that
increasing the tax is less likely to relieve poverty. In fact, many tobacco
companies make jobs such as agriculture, manufacturing the tobacco. Therefore,
if cigarettes company companies lose their position because of a higher revenue, 높은 소득때문에 위치를 잃는다는 표현이 잘 이해되지 않습니다. 지문을 한번 더 확인해주세요. the job
in the company would disappear. be disappeared. This could make poverty and poor people’s situation severe. severely. This counters the reading passage’s argument that the increasing the
tax increased can be used to relieve poverty.
Comment : 대립되는 두 지문의 포인트는 각각 잘 드러나지만, 불필요한 내용이 들어가거나 내용이 애매한 부분들은 더 수정이 필요해 보입니다. 지문 내용을 검토하면서 꼭 필요한 detail만 남긴 요약문이 되도록 한 번 더 정돈해주세요. 어색한 문법표현도 꼼꼼하게 체크해주세요~ 수고 많으셨습니다~!
Integrated Writing Rubrics Score 3/5 A response at this level contains some important information from the lecture and conveys some relevant connection to the reading, but it is marked by one or more of the following : - Although the overall response is definitely oriented to the task, it conveys only vague, global, unclear, or somewhat imprecise connection of the points made in the lecture to points made in the reading. - The response may omit one major key point made in the lecture. - Some key points made in the lecture or the reading, or connections between the two, may be incomplete, inaccurate, or imprecise. - Errors of usage and/or grammar may be more frequent or may result in noticeably vague expressions or obscured meanings in conveying ideas and connections.
|