▶ Your Answer :
Some people thinks that Universities
should spend their money on improving social
activities. However, in my opinion, I believe that Universities must invest to enhance the
food quality of cafeterias in the School. This is because, the
quality of the food of cafeterias is
closely related with students’ academic
performance and helps them to save money.
To begin with, there are
is a close relationship between the food quality of cafeterias
and students’ academic performance. Abundant
nutrients can promote brain activity so that students’
academic performance can be increased. For example, recently, a study from
University of Minnesota was released in The Journal of Neuroscience which
claims that some nutrients are essential for brain activity. The research team
compared two groups. One group was composed of those
who only consumed carbohydrates, and the other group ate various kinds of food
to obtain many nutrients such as vitamins and minerals over a course of a semester.
that one group only had carbohydrate and the other group had various food to
obtain many nutrients such as vitamin and some minerals during a semester. As
a results, the final examination scores of the latter group was
were higher than formal group’s. Therefore, they could conclude that improving the food quality of
cafeterias is necessary for their academic
activity.
On top of that,
improved food quality of cafeterias can help
students to save their money. Usually, schools provides food with cheaper
prices than those of than restaurants outsides of school.
Therefore, students can reduce their living expenses by having their meals in cafeterias. For
example, the cafeteria in my collage college was so poor. So, I usually had lunch and
dinner in some restaurants outside of school with friends. However, the
foods of restaurants are were not only
relatively expensive, but also the food quality was somewhat salty low. Because of many complains complaints of students towards the school, my collage college
decided to improve the cafeteria and provide
good quality of food with a relatively
low price. After that, I could save a good amount
of money from my living expenses by having lunch and dinner in the cafeteria.
To sum up, food is an
imperative factor for students to improve
academic performance and save living expenses. In this regard, I strongly
believe that the Universities should
invest to improve cafeterias and the food
quality for students.
Writing
0-30 Score Scale |
Fair (17-23) |
Score |
23 |
Overall
Comment: |
Argument가 탄탄하고
논리적입니다. 예시도 좋구요. 다만 문법 오류가 잦습니다. 철자 오류도 많습니다. Collage -> college. 위 지적사항들을
참고하세요. |
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