■ Direction Read the question below. You have 30 minutes to plan, write, and revise your essay. Typically, an effective response will contain a minimum of 300 words. ■ Question Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Use specific reason and examples to support your answer |
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▶ Topic :Leadership includes many qualities, such as charisma, consideration, courage, flexibility, responsibility, and respect for others. It is a born-gift; people cannot learn to be a leader. |
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▶ Your Answer :
It is debatable
whether leadership is a born-gift and cannot be learned. This is an intriguing
question because opinions concerning this issue can be different relying on the
individual perspectives. In my opinion, however, I support that leadership is
not a born-gift so we can learn to be a leader for the following reasons.
To
begin with, people are made by education, not being born with talent. To be
specific, when people were born, we did not (줄임말을 지양해주세요.) know anything like speaking, eating and
so on. After some kind of education from our parents, we can do something like
people. People are one of the most weak (품사) creatures (단복수) among the world. However by
learning, we determine the way to be stronger and most powerful predators. For example,
one of scientific experiments proves (주어 동사 불일치) this issue. The Wolf Kids was abandoned in nature
and he didn’t take any training by people. When people discovered him, he couldn’t
speak a word and just growled. If the Wolf Kids had taken a regular training
course, he could have been like other children.
In
addition, leadership is a (관사) virtue that we have to study because some stunning leaders got leadership through their experience. To be specific, several leaders didn’t
have their overwhelming ability at first. Most of them didn’t have that skill
at the beginning. However, during relationships with other people whether they
had leadership or not, they grasp the capability. For example, KimGoo who are working
for Korean independence was gatekeeper at first. He just watched what the
leaders did. But, as Japan’s powerful (단어가 빠져있는거 같습니다) suppress to independence group, lots of
leaders were died. He continued to help for his country’s independence so he did
the task with great leadership that he learned over a person’s shoulder. If leadership
was a natural born ability , Kim Goo, one of the most capable leaders, should not have been able to help Korea's independence.
In
conclusion, I firmly believe that leadership is not a born-gift so people can
learn to be a leader. All things considered, it is my belief that my argument
regarding this topic has been efficiently and precisely delivered with the reasons
mentioned above. Never should we forget that this issue may have a huge impact
on our people society. |
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1. 자잘한 문법 오류들이 많은 편입니다.
proof-reading을 꼼꼼히 하시기 바랍니다.
그리고 꼭 필요한 문장성분이 빠져있는 경우 또한 잦은 거 같습니다.
이 경우에 있어서는 이해에 혼란을 주니
반드시 문장이 제대로 잘 쓰였는지를 보시기 바랍니다.
2. 2nd paragraph에서 lots of leaders가 어떤 것을 했고
김구 선생님은 또 어떤 것을 배워서 활용하셨는지
구체적인 설명이 필요해보입니다.
수고하셨습니다. *^^*