■ Direction Read the question below. You have 30 minutes to plan, write, and revise your essay. Typically, an effective response will contain a minimum of 300 words. ■ Question Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Use specific reason and examples to support your answer |
|
|
▶ Topic :
People have a lot of opinions about the value of advanced education.
Which do you think is the most important reason to attend college or university?
Use reasons and examples to support your answer.
- new experiences
- career preparation
- increased knowledge
|
|
|
▶ Your Answer :
Thanks to the advanced education, we can push personal boundaries forward to the college or university. Correspondingly, it is highly debatable which is the most significant reason to attend college or university. In general, the consensus view seems to be that the main reason to attend university is to increase their knowledge or prepare their career. In my opinion, however, I firmly believe that people who want to attend university put a high priority on experiencing new things for the following two subsequent reasons.
First and foremost, universities all around the world offer their students endless new experience and chances through a wide array of activities such as scientific experiments, performing their instruments, and specific masterclasses, which means that students can expand their perspectives. To be specific, as the world is increasingly becoming developed and competitive, today’s societies require open-minded people having a variety of experiences. Thus, most university students can experience various activities, attending their universities. For example, when I was a university student majoring in Piano performance, my school offered me a lot of chances to hold concerts in the city halls and campus halls. To be honest, in high school, I had no experience of performing it in front of many people. However, as I attended my music school, many recitals allowed me to enhance my personal piano skills and build my experiences. Hence, I could get an admission successfully from a lot of graduate schools.
In addition, in university-school life, there are a lot of challenging problems, which enable them to strengthen a sense of adaption. To be specific, university students should encounter and deal with many problems such as interpersonal concerns about their professors and peers and living in their dorms, not to mention their immense assignments. They can learn how to interact with others and handle their problems by attending a university with various students. For instance, there is a poll conducted by the Johns Hopkins University with their 500 students majoring in social philosophy. The purpose of the survey is to understand the importance of handling their problems in their school life. The majority of them argued that attending university is not only learning academies but also gives us valuable life lessons. An overwhelming 92 percent responded that through a variety of experiences, they learned the ability to adapt to (그들의 시점이기 때문에 they라고 합니다) new peers, teachers, living patterns, and learning habits.
In conclusion, taking a lot of chances and experiences, and a sense of adaption into consideration, I strongly believe that most high school students go to university in order to experience so many things. Never should we forget that this issue may have a huge impact on our lives.
|
|
내용(이유) 두 가지 모두 무난하게 잘 서술하신 것 같습니다.
자잘한 문법 오류가 많은 편입니다.
proof-reading을 꼼꼼히 해서 실수를 줄여주세요.
그리고 conclusion에 therefore, the most important reason to attend college is new experiences
이런 식으로 문장 하나를 더 추가해주시면 좋을 거 같습니다!
수고하셨습니다. *^^*