The lecturer argues that preventing hailstorms that causes damage to crops by using Cloud seeding method is not effective.(문장구성을 조금 바꿔주시는 게 좋을 것 같아요. 문장의 의미가 약간 애매합니다. Cloud seeding을 통해서 hailstorm을 막는다는 의미로 쓰셨지만 문장구성 때문에 hailstorm 이 cloud seeding을 통해서 농작물을 해한다는 의미로 해석될수도 있어요) This contradicts the reading passage's assertion that we can control the advent of the hailstorms by using Cloud seeding method.
To start with, the lecturer points out that the ramification of Cloud seeding method is highly capricious. This is because the real environment and weather conditions are susceptible to many other conditions; therefore we can't expect the same successful result as lab experiments has shown. This refutes the reading passages assumption that the Cloud seeding method has been proven to be effective. (reading 에서 어떤식으로 prove 했는지 약간의 detail을 포함해주는 것도 좋을 것 같아요)And secondly, the lecturer contends that even though actual implement of the Cloud seeding method in at Shanghai and Beijing has shown successful result, that doesn't mean we can apply the same method in to mid-west region of the U.S. This is because of the high rate of air pollution and smog in Shanghai and Beijing may had affected the result of the application. This casts doubt on reading passage's suggestion that the Cloud seeding method was successful in Shanghai and Beijing region. (제 생각엔 reading의 의견을 먼저 쓰고 lecturer이 refute을 하는데 reading에서 성공적이었다는 결과가 다른 지역에서도 일어나란 법은 없다. 라고 쓰는 게 좋은 것 같아요)
Lastly, the lecturer also argues that the 30 percent drop in hail is not unreflective of the utilization of the Cloud seeding method. This is because of that the 30 percent drop in hail had occurred not only at the region that the method had been was applied applicated, but also at other region resulted decreasing of precipitation of hail. This casts doubt on reading passages’ point contend that application of the Cloud seeding method is the direct cause of the decrease in hail precipitation in Kansas region.
전반적으로 나쁘지는 않은데 lecturer과 reading의 내용을 좀 더 연관시킬 수 있으면 더 좋을 것 같아요. 그리고 마지막 문단은 다시한번 읽어보고 수정해주시는 게 좋을 것 같아요. Not only~ but also~ 구문을 제대로 사용해 주셔야 합니다.