▶ Your Answer : Although many people agree about that the development of techinological tools has raised huge development of today's human civilizations, also they think there are lots negative problem at it, and the one of problems is men's loneliness. However, I think it is just people use it wrong way, and it must have fall them lonely themselves. Furthermore, I agree that there are lost of merits of those developments which can help people communicate each other. By this reasons, I refutes about those development created civilization's loneliness. To begin with, some people said smart phone and internet increase amount of loneliness. However, not days, the world's people use social network service. When we look this service, its name is also network. It means it connects people to people. To be specific, by development of communicate system, all of earth people can talk and meet each other even they are so far to meet. For example, people who do not have people also can make friends in social network like Twitter of Face book. He does not have time to feel lonely because he can communicate with foreigner friend every time. Like this, these developming help people not feel boring every day. Moreover, we cannot forget development of transportation when we talk about modern civilizations. There is not doubt that developed transportations also have contributed to human. For instance, trains have served its roll carrying people and other food from far away to other country. By this, people can move to other country easirly. Also, like airline makes people to meet their family even they are living in other city like Korea to Japan. Lastly, the most efficient of development of civilization is convenient. People may have not recognized but all development makes people can have more leisure time and convenient things than ever. People can have their own time or go outside with their friends. For me, I always go outside to spend time with family when mother's home work is finished. Mom said these dinner time at outside restausrant cannout be thoght when she was young because there was not time to rest. However, people have their time to talk with others, and even there are so lots of think to enjoy by developing of many things, like play things. So, it will be heard little strangely if one said I am lonely. Of course there are negative things that people said about development of technological tool. However, if may adapt to people who use it by not good way. If people use correctly development of those today's things, people cannot be lonely. By those three reasons, I disagree that human's development of tools make people to feel lonely in the modern civilization. *^c^ 첨삭해주시는분? 감사해요~~ 전 중3이구 이건 학원에서 월말 칠때 한건데 세세하게 문법과 단어가 뭐가 틀렷다 보단 어떤 점을 고쳐야 할지 전체적으로 말해주세요 ㅠㅠㅠ매번 18점 정도 나오는디 어느부분을 고쳐야 고득점을 받을까요? |