▶ Your Answer : 연어님,,논리구성 다시 해보았어요..봐주세요.ㅠ_ㅠ 도무지 어떻게 해야할지 모르겠어요;;; ㅠ 자꾸 길어져요; 1.sports에 돈을 쓰면 학생들이 건강해진다> 스포츠는 학생들의 건강에 도움이 되기 때문에> 학교가 도서관에 투자하는 것은 학생의 성적을 올리기 위한 것일 것이다> 성적을 올리려면 공부를 해야하고, 공부는 건강한 체력이 있어야 잘 할 수 있다> 따라서, 학생들을 위해 스포츠센터를 설립해야 한다> 스포츠 생활 없이 공부만하면 학생들은 작은일에도 스트레스를 받고 결국 학생들의 공부와 건강을 방해할 것이다 > 이런 스트레스는 학생과 학교 모두에게 해롭다> EX) 2.sports에 투자하는 것은 학생들의 책임감을 길러줄 수 있다>운동은 학생들에게 다른사람을 이해하는 마음을 갖게 해준다,팀웍을 통해> 팀웍은 책임감을 만들 수 있다> 스포츠센터 설립에 투자하면 자연스럽게 학생들이 운동을 더 많이 할 환경이 갖춰지고 책임감 기를 수 있다> 게다가 책임감 있는 학생은 공부도 잘한다>EX) Some people think that advantages of spending money for libraries far outweigh those of spending money for sports for universities. However, in my opinion, investing money for sports center so important work for students and universities as spending money for libraries for two reasons: to keep healthy and to enhance a sense of responsibilities. To begin with, spending money for sports allows students to stay healthy. This is because building sports center can positive impact on students’ health. So to speak, universities generally want to raise students’ grade, in this sense, the school investing more money on libraries than sports. However, in order to upgrade students’ grade, students need to have strong physical health, because study is very difficult work without physical strength. At this point, universities should spending money for building a sports center in school. Without doing a sports just only to study in libraries, students will be prone to stressed out insignificant matters, and this will interrupt students’ studies as well as health. So, these stress is very harmful not only students but also universities. According to a study conducted by Seoul National Universities of Korea in 2012, a test on mice showed that life span was shorten when they regularly underwent series of electric shocks. Interestingly, the researchers found a link between this and human beings who suffered form periodic stress. This implies showed that high stress levels can negatively affects humans, resulting in a shorter life span. On top of that, investing money for sports plays a significant role in improving students’ sense of responsibility. This is due to the fact that doing a sports provides students to have understanding others through teamworks. And, teamworks can possible to make responsibilities to students. With this respect, if universities building sports centers, students naturally set sports surroundings in school and they can get more time for playing sports than before. Thus, they can obtain a sense of responsibilities. And plus, responsible students even study better than their friends who do not playing sports only to study in libraries. According to a study conducted by Seoul National Universities of Korea in 2010, students who do study better academically than their peers who do not because they know how handle multiple tasks and responsibilities through play sports and can consequently manage their time well. On the whole, students who struggle to study and play sports are more mature and better equipped to succeed than their peers who do not. I’m sure that these benefits extend far outside the classroom. To sum up, universities benefits from investing money on libraries as much money as they do on sports in order to succeed in students’ life. This attributed to the fact that it is capable of developing a sense of responsibilities and improving students’ health. In this regard, I strongly agree with the statement that universities should spend as much money on sports as they do on libraries for the reasons I mentioned above. |