I am convinced that people often buy products not because they need them but because others buy them. One reason for my argument is that people do not want to feel a sense of alienation. The other reason is that people do not want to feel a sense of inferiority.
First of all, people do not want to feel a sense of alienation. For example if the girl whose classmates mainly wear popular clothes do not purchase a cloth in style, it is difficult for her to make friends with them because her classmates will think she has little interest in clothes and they have little mutual interests. But if she buys fashionable clothes, she can make her classmates to deem that she has interest in fashion, and her classmates think that there are mutual interest among her and them. So she can easily talk with her classmates and get to mingle with them without difficulty and will not feel left out. As a result these popular products that a number of people purchase make people do not feel a sense of alienation.
More over, people purchase products not to feel a sense of inferiority even though they do not need the products. For example, a high school student who have outdated cell phone will think he is behind the times because most his friends have iphone4 or other smart phones that newly launched. So he end up purchase ends up purchasing the latest smart phone because at that age, today’s most teenagers are sensitive newest technology and have strong self-respect. Hence, these products that make people more competent enable people do to not feel a sense of inferiority.
-밑줄친 부분의 because 이후는 argument를 뒷받침해주는 내용이 되면 좋을것 같습니다.
-body1과 body2의 내용이 크게 구별이 없어보입니다 :)
-conlcusion은 wrap-up sentence가 아니라 wrap-up paragraph가 되어야 합니다 :)
In conclusion, for the above reasons, I strongly agree with this statement that people often buy products not because they need them but because others buy them. |