All university students should be required to take history courses. 죄송합니다.. 제가 한번 검토하고 올려야하는데.. 시간이 없어서.. 그냥쓰고 올리는점 양해해주세요.. 정말 제가 생각해도.. 최저의 실력이네요.. 욕이라도 좋습니다.. 부탁드려요 ㅠ_ㅠ |
Some people say that all university students should be required to take history courses. (문제와 똑같은 문장으로 시작하는거 매우 안좋습니다 PARAPHRASE 아시죠 ㅎ)However, I disagree (with the idea)that all students must take history classes for two reasons. First, today’s(없는게 낳을듯 하네요 ㅎ) college students have not (do not have)enough time to achieve even(even 도 삭제 ㅎ) their own major expertise. Second, obligated studying(subject는 어떨까요? ㅎ) is not (a) good way to learn something.(저라면 I disagree with the idea that students should not be forced to learn history in university because first, college students even do not have time to concentrate on their own majors; second, required courses do no good for students in their studies. 라고 썼을것 같네요 ㅎ)
Most of all, today’s students have (are haveing)a hard time studying (to study)their own major and (have )other important subjects which is(which is 는 되도록이면 생략해도 되요 ㅎ) necessity (necessary)to get a job. In fact, history is (a) very useful knowledge(subject). As(if) we know older people’s life(lives of our ancestors), we can forestall unpredicted problems. However, college students have to study many things to prepare for their future jobs. (앞에 in fact 보다는 even if 를 써야겠네요 음 even if history is a very useful subject since it helps students to solve unpredicted problems 라고 쓰고 뒤에 좀 고치고 ㅎ)Because,(becauses는 강조할때만 문장 맨앞에 오고 그때도 뒤에 이유가 나와야되요 because로 쓸려면 this is because 라고 써야됩니다ㅎ this 는 앞문장 전체를 받는거고요) today’s economy is bad(경제가 나쁘다.... 콩글리쉬죠 ㅎ current economy is in recession정도로 바꾸는게 좋겠네요 ㅎ), students’ jobs(job도 괜찮은데 자주 쓰면 그러니까 career도 가끔 써주는 샌스 ㅎ) are always not guaranteed. Under this circumstance, many students make effort to gain a good grade and study even business administration as a double major. In addition, they have to participate in club activities to give good impression in a job interview. In deed, history course is not direct knowledge to get a job. So, taking history class might be time-consuming recently. If school compress to take history class to students, they would have less competitiveness in the job market. Today’s students have more important goal for their future career. This shows that required history courses are not good way. (이 앞부분 전체는 thesis랑 안맞는거 같네요 전공공부하느라 바쁘다 라고했는데 이중전공도 해야되고 동아리 활동 이런거 해야된다 보다는 전공의 어려움을 좀더 쓰시는게 ㅎ)
Next, students can’t concentrate on the courses well(when they are obligation). They, also, easily lose their interest to history area at once.(이건 역사 수업이 재미 없는거지 강요해서 재미 없는게 아니니까 좀 안맞는 문장인듯 하네요) Truly, history classes have a lot of(흠 few 라고 해야되지 않을까요 ㅎ) interesting contents so many students like to take the classes. However, most students feel tedious when they are required something because they are not able to have satisfaction in forced classes.(? 무슨 내용인지... 일단은 they cannot satisfy in forced class) Let me take my experience that(x) when I was in the first year of college(when I was a freshman), I had to take freshman’s prerequisite course about introduction to Korean history. Although the class is(was) not bad and even interesting, I feel boring always in the class. (자꾸 이 실수 하시는데 A하지만 B하다 할때 주장하고 싶은 내용이 B면 A를 약하게 쓰셔야죠 ㅎ 내용이 나쁘지 않고 심지어 흥미롭기까지 했는데 boring 했다? 좀 이상하죠 ㅎ)This was because I wanted to take other courses and escape the history field because(because는 반복 안됩니당 ) I studied the area for tons of time in high school. So I thought that I have enough knowledge. In this sense, school should not require history class to students.(마지막 무슨 말인지....)
In conclusion, I disagree that students should be forced to take history class on(in) campus for the reasons that I have mentioned above. First, students have not(do not have) enough time. Second, students does not concentrate on the class well.
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