> > 2010-09-17 22:28:53, '' 님이 쓰신 글입니다. ↓
■ Direction Read the question below. You have 30 minutes to plan, write, and revise your essay. Typically, an effective response will contain a minimum of 300 words. ■ Question Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Use specific reason and examples to support your answer | |
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Topic :It is important to have rules about the types of clothing that people are allowed to wear to school. | |
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Most people have their own ideas whether it is legitimate for student to wear a uniform at school.
Some people might think that uniform is beneficial because it can save money and can reduce competitive emotion about what they wear among friends adolescent. However, others may say that the effects of taking uniforms are likely to be harmful. I concede that wearing speicific clothes at school can be favorable, but its disadvantages far outweight its advantages. 그냥 이것도 괜찮고 저것도 괜찮은데 저게 좀더괜찮다는 찝찝한 말 말보다는 확실하게 한쪽으로 치우치시는게 더 좋다고 봅니다 :)
First of all, let's think about the stance of student. When they are in adolescent, they enjoy representing theirselves by hairstyle, shoes, and clothes (cloth는 천입니다. 모직물). So, if schools restrict what to wear, the student might have rebellion (단체로 들고일어나다까지 표현하시려는것은 아닌것 같은데 뜻이 그렇습니다.) and they might think it is unreasonable order. This way of thinking might affect student badly. Besides, students need to think creatively because original thinking makes students more intelligent. <-좀더 설명 Though, uniform dsiturb student's creative thinking since it inhibits the chance of appeal by taking different dress and same clothes could cause students same thought <-unclear sentence. Therefore, we can say that wearing uniform might interrupt student's creative thought.
Next, We can imagine (imagine은 말그대로 상상) the viewpoint of teachers. Some of teachers are likely to prefer uniform since it is one of the ffective ways of restraining student. But how about think this way? This is an inappropriate view in my opinion. Teachers instruct their students that ' we are live in the place of liberty'. The students have to know that we are living in a society of freedom and responsibility. When students see themselves in a tedious uniform, When students heard this statement, they casts cast(이런거는 틀리시면 안되요 ㅠㅠ) doubt on the idea because they are limited what to wear. Subsequently, they might fall in confusion and they could think that 'If our country is liberal, why we cannot can't we choose clothes in school?'. So it is safe to say that restricting what to wear could cause student's confusion since they are in the process of growth.
To sum up, allowing students to wear what they want is very important due to student's creative thinking and their counfusion about the concept of liberty. All things considerd, taking uniform can be beneficial, but its disadvantges far outwight its advantages.
네 :) 말하고자 싶어하시는 바는 잘 알겠으나
아직까지는 표현력이 많이 부족하십니다.
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이 정도면 Good 일까요 Fair 일까요 ㅠㅠ
Fair 에 가깝겠지만 그래도 tutor 님 덕분에
Good의 꿈을 꿉니다^^ 매번 감사합니다!!