1) The most effective way for the government to conserve energy is to increase the price of gasoline and electricity.
Some believe that regulation of price is the most effective method to save energy in modern society. However, I do not agree with the statement in the topic. In my opinion, increasing prices of energy resources is not only inefficient strategy to achieve the goal, saving energy, but also high-> but also incorporates likelihood of market fluctuation for the following reasons.
To begin with, people will use gasoline and electricity as much as they have used before even though the price is increased. It is true that government can regulate the use of some kinds of products by control-> controlling the price, but use of certain products such as energy and food that is essential for life may not be possible to be controlled. Once in the past, there was an influential financial crisis in South Korea due to the sudden increase of oil price in Middle East Countries where South Korea heavily relies on for fulfilling oil supply. The price of gasoline was-> 생략 surprisingly skyrocketed, so government announced several energy saving policies toward citizen in order to regulate oil market price. However, in reality, people spent gasoline as usual regardless of the price because oil is necessarily for life.-> because oil is necessary for living. It shows that regulating price of products that
basically needs to live including gasoline and electricity is not a good strategy to decrease the amount of use.
In addition, as far as the overall market stability is concerned, it is undesirable to increase energy prices on the purpose of saving energy. It is imperative that the much price of gasoline and electricity increased the higher price customers pay for other goods as well. From making soaps to building houses, energy resource is most crucial elements to make, convey, and sell products, so increasing price of those energy may directly and immediately affect on the price that customers should pay for. So, it may be harmful the stabilization of market price of an entire nation. Not to mention, once the market price starts to fluctuate, government should spend a lot of money and effort in order for stabilizing it. Thus, regulating price as a means to conserve energy is dangerous idea for a nation. -> 논리전개가 매우 잘이루어졌네요.
In conclusion, I am skeptical of the argument in the topic that government should control prices of gasoline and electricity in order to save energy; rather, I strongly believe that increase prices of those energy resources draws huge disadvantage by fluctuating overall market prices.
-> 전체적으로 글쓰는것은 문제가 거의 없으신듯합니다. 가끔 보이는 문법실수들만 좀주의하셔야겠네요 :)