■ Direction Read the question below. You have 30 minutes to plan, write, and revise your essay. Typically, an effective response will contain a minimum of 300 words.
■ Question Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Use specific reason and examples to support your answer
▶ Topic :
Comprehending the past is crucial to being able to tackle obstacles facing us now and in the future
▶ Your Answer :
There is some disagreement over whether understanding of the past enables one to be able to tackle current and future obstacles well. Some people think that as there is a huge difference between the past and the present or future, comprehension of the past is not beneficial to getting through current difficult situations. However, in my opinion, learning from the past is of importance on handling current or future obstacles in our lives. This is because, it allows us to prevent from making same mistake as before. Moreover, one can predict life in the future based on one’s experience in the past.
To begin with, the understanding of the past helps us not to make a same mistake in the future. Learning from the history is very precious in our lives because the past experience gives us good lessons. People can fix themselves not to repeat their bad experience, so consequently they will have better lives in the future. For instance, during this pandemic
(앞에 의미가 내포된 거라 다시 적어주지 않아도 됩니다) is they have learned from the past. In the past, when there were contagious diseases such as SARS and MERS, South Korea was not good at handling the situations. However, South Korea took those situations as good lessons for the future, they established a solid system of controlling health issues. As a result, thanks for the past experience on dealing with viruses, there are few corona virus cases in South Korea.
Furthermore, one can predict what will happen in the future by comprehending the past. Our past experiences give us clues of our lives in the present and the future. Generally saying, history repeats itself. My personal experience is a compelling example on this. My dad had a heart problem when he was 20 year old. At that time, even though he felt pain near his left chest, he ignored the symptom because he thought he was too young to have a serious health issue. However, after he experienced a big heart surgery at the age of 20, he learned from himself that he should not overlook at least a slight symptom. As a result, whenever he feels sore on his body, he immediately goes to the hospital to get a check-up. Consequently, my dad is very healthy and he is being very careful of his body condition everyday. From my dad’s account, had he not experienced the heart problem at an early age, he would have not been able to take care of his body condition like now.
To sum up, comprehending the past plays a vital role in improving our life qualities now and in the future. Not only it enables us to be aware of mistakes we have made in the past, but it also let us foresee our future and prepare for what will come next. In this regard, I strongly believe that learning from the past is important when we need to handle obstacles in our lives.
주장 아주 좋습니다. 이해도 잘 되고, 주장에 대한 supporting detail들도 적절하게 잘 작성하셨습니다.
가장 아쉬운 건 에세이 자체가 조금 더 neat해질 수 있을 거 같아요. 무슨 의미냐면 문장을 적을 때 이미 앞에 조금 나왔는데도 반복적으로 적은 듯한 부분이 꽤 보이는데 이러한 부분 최소화하면 좋을 거 같습니다.
문장 너무 길게 적으려고 하는 것보다는 짧게 짧게 끝내는데 의미 전달 잘 될 수 있도록 적는 게 좋을 거 같아요