▶ Your Answer :Teachers sometimes end up revolving around political issues and opinions in their lessons intentionally or not. In a blink of the eye, students might found themselves in a political discussion rather than a history class. In this case, students who have received political opinions in their early years in school, might be mired in their future political mindsets. Conveying political opinions in their classes, whether teachers might know or not of what they are doing, one clear thing 이렇게 모호한 단어 사용 지양해주세요is that it is wrong. In the following paragraph I’ll explain detailed and logical reasons on my statement.
To begin with, teachers conveying personal political opinions to students(이 주장의 point는 teacher이니 잊지 않고 적어줘야 합니다) can be seriously problematic. (주장의 첫 문장에는 이렇게 뭉뚱그려 대답하면 안 됩니다. 정확하게 왜 problematic한지 설명이 꼭 나와줘야 합니다) Not only because it changes the objective of a lesson, but also it can change the way of thinking of young students. For example, let’s say that Ms. Anderson teaches history at a high school. One day, she teaches the chapter of World War 1 to the class and introduces which nations were involved in this war. Suddenly, taking part of Europe, she starts to blame Japan, saying that their political regime is wrong and that the European one is the best. Then she goes on to explain for an hour about how bad is that and how good is this. The problem of this lecture is that there is a minimal information of the main topic which is World War 1, and it is mainly about a personal perspective about current nations. At the end of the day, students would just remember about how inefficient is Japan and how Europe is perfect. Moreover, just because students have heard about an opinion about another country in a lecture, their perception of it would be permanent. For students, school is the major part of their life and they primarily focus on the lessons. Therefore, they are more likely to absorb any information given in the lecture at this age.
On top of that, the teacher’s role in a lecture is to be impartial. (이렇게 위의 예시 언급하기 전에 자기 주장 설명이 조금 더 자세하게 나왔더라면 이해가 쉬웠을 것입니다)Now, in the example discussed in the previous paragraph, the teacher made a totally personal statement which not only is unnecessary but also wrong for a teacher. Teachers are educated to not mention any personal opinion or partial statement that could mislead and affect the students’ way of thinking. The teacher in the example, absolutely violated the role of a teacher and might have caused a negative effect to students.
Students build up their personalities and mindsets mostly in their school years. Therefore, a wrong education might affect them for a life-long period. The thoughts formed in this school period are hard to change later, so to prevent students from being affected to unnecessary and dangerous thoughts teachers must be aware of what they are teaching to their students.
문장적인 오류가 많이 보이는 편입니다. 문법 오류 중에서도 수일치 특히 신경쓰기를 추천드립니다. +한 문장 안에서는 시제 동일하게 나올 수 있도록 적어야 합니다. 너무 헷갈리면 현재 시제로 통일하는 것이 좋습니다. 그리고 위에서 말한 것처럼 전체적으로 예시가 너무 길게 나오는 편입니다. 조금 더 concise하게 줄이고 두번째 main paragraph에서 own예시 썼다면 더 좋았을 거 같아요
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