> > 2010-05-28 13:04:12, '' 님이 쓰신 글입니다. ↓
■ Direction Read the question below. You have 30 minutes to plan, write, and revise your essay. Typically, an effective response will contain a minimum of 300 words. ■ Question Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Use specific reason and examples to support your answer | |
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Topic : 정부는 인터넷에 돈 더 써야 하나, 공공교통에 더 돈 써야 하나?
( 늘 5분정도가 모자르네요..ㅠ.ㅠ 단어 중심으로 더 부드럽고 자연스러운 단어, 프레이즈로 바꿔주시면 넘넘 감사할거예요!! 너무 오랜만에 쓰는거라 표현도 딱딱한것만 생각 나고...표현이 어색하고....) | |
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There are several ideas about wether whether the Korean government should put more budget on public transportation. Some people say that developing the public transportation for easy access to everyone is more important than spending money on the expanding of the Internet in Korea. In my opinion, however, the Korean government should spend more money on expanding the Internet lines rather than on the public transportation, because it makes the Korean economy stronger, and the Internet brings true meaning of democracy.
To the begin with, developing the Internet lines for everyone helps the Korean economy stronger. Thesedays goods and information are transacted on the Internet, which gives impact on the whole economy. Actually, it has changed the condition of the economy. For example, many people prefer shopping on line to offline. Therefore, almost all companies are now realizing the power of the online consumers. If the government puts more money on the Internet, more people can be participated in the transactions on line which will make our economy stronger, because the Korean government is now facing the need of boosting buy and sell. On the other hand, spending budget on transportation doesn't help the nation stronger, because almost all roads and highways have already been developed. Therefore, Korean people will not use the new subways and roads because they already have the world famous convenient transportation system.
Furthermore, the Internet actualizes the true meaning of democracy. Newspapers and magazines are easy to make people preconceived for political matters. Actually, several Korean governments in the past used broadcasting companies and newspaper firms for their sake. However, on the Internet all information is opened and people can share all kinds of ideas and information. Therefore, the true meaning of democracy, which is that all people can freely share and speak their ideas about political issues, can be actualized. The government can no longer control the news and ideas if people can share them on the Internet. However, if the government puts more money on the public transportation, it will not contribute to the development of our nation's democracy.
On the conclusion, the Korean government has to spend more money on the Internet rather than on the transportation system for the vivid economy and establishment of the true democracy. If the government puts more money on the transportation, it will waste of money, and it doesn't give any good influence of realization of the democracy. Therefore, the Korean government definitely should increase the budget on the expanding the Internet lines for everyone in Korea. | |
** 내용 좋아요...근데 therefore 넘넘넘 많이 나와용, ^^ 다양한 접속사들로 바꿔보심이
어떨련지...**