▶ Your Answer :
Some people think that we live in harder
era compared to past. in comparison to the past. However, in my opinion, these statement came from a subjectivity
because everyone is suffered from hard life to come up with this complex era. I
agree that we live in a better place than yesterday for the following two subsequent reasons.
To begin with, developed infrastructure and
welfare system in modern times make it harder to imagine that we live in
nineteenth century. There are lots of hospitals, restaurant, library and supermarket
in this city we live. Also nations provide a service to poor. Although it is
not enough to gratify, it is improved result and it continues to grow. For
example, when I was young and had serious headache at midnight, there was a
hospital for me and metro or bus to provide us a means to go hospital easily.
The cost of remedy was not cheap but insurance gave huge support to pay.
Without this system, I think today’s life would not be here. Thus we should
appreciate to this modern society.
On the top of that, there is a high end
technology applied to everyone. Compared to 10 years ago, we can download 2
gigabyte movie in 10 minutes as the smartphone technology advanced. We can call
to police even though we are on the top of mountain or send images need to
understand the lecture in one second. For instance, my professor wanted me to
print out the homework and review this on the lecture. Unfortunately I realized
I forgot this one before the lecture started, I ran to print office and solved
it with my smartphone less than 1 minute.
To sum up, I think we live in a better
place composed of many social insurance service, skyrocketed technology which
can make us satisfy. our lives. In this regard, I think we don’t have to
compare this life with past because it is evident that modern cities are
better.
점수: 27 지적할 부분이 없는 독립형 에세이입니다. 독립형 에세이에서 가장 중요한 부분을 차지하는 것은 설득력 입니다. 지금 이 에세이 같은 경우에 있어서는 설득력 부분에 있어서는 완벽하게 자신의 주장을 잘 보여주는 독립형 에세이입니다. 각 단락에서의 구체적 설명과 적절한 예시 사용은 독자로 하여금 왜 지금 우리가 사는 삶이 과거 보다 좋은 지를 아주 논리정연하게 잘 설명해 주는 거 같습니다. 수고많으셨습니다.
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