▶ Your Answer :
It
is an intriguing question because opinion concerning this issue can relaying on
different perspectives be different depending on people's perspective (it에 대상이 무엇인가요? 구체적으로 에세이 주제를 서술하시길 바랍니다). Some people think that knowing how read and write is
less important than it has never been to read and write is less important. However, in my opinion, I think that is
more important nowadays for several reasons. reading and writing has placed important value for the following two subsequent reasons.
First
of all, most company hired people with writing and reading skill who have excellent reading and writing skills. It is required
people have writing and reading skill. for people to have a writing and reading skill. To survive in this world of endless
competition, people ought to have writing and reading skill (너무 반복되는 표현들을 계속해서 서술하고 있는 거 같습니다). Everyone is aware
that promoting in business is like a camel passing through the eye of a needle
nowadays. One’s ability can be clouded by other’s abilities, so in order to
stand out Having reading and writing skill is essential and fundmental factor
in this day. reading and writing skills have become fundamental factor to get succeeded. For example, when my brother had seeked seek a job last year, he
realized every company require wirting and reading skill of Korean and English,
even it is fundmental factor requires writing and reading skills even if it is fundamental ability (company는 단수 주어 입니다). However, my brother did not very well English was not good at English. so,
he had to study this skill. While the half year, he studied hard and finally he
can get a job.
Second,
It is valuable skill in your life. because if you have great writing and
reading skill, other people will be regarded you as “a person of intelligence”
in this day writing and reading skill is important in life. When people have great writing and reading skills, they are considered as person of intellect (독립형 에세이에서는 you를 서술하면 안됩니다). As you know, a person who have great language skill can understand
other things easier has language skill can understand other things easier. I believe language skill is one of a essential factors to
success in various factor succeed. Imagine people did not have language skill their understanding
range and views will be so narrow. For
example, my uncle have amazing languge ability at reading and writing has amazing language ability. so, he can
learn other foreign langue easily. I think it is a precious ability because
since he can learn fast other language, he can communicate with foreigners in
this glober society.
To
sum up, since to survive in this world and for having bettr range of understanding.
I think having writing and reading skill is ore important than it has ever
been.
점수: 18 일단 문법적 오류 부터 시작해서 전체적으로 전체적으로 에세이가 어색한 표현들이 많습니다. 이러한 부분은 에세이의 플로우를 방해하기 때문에 제가 지적한 부분을 참고하시면서 에세이를 서술하시길 바랍니다. 또한 너무 반복되는 표현들이 많습니다. 이러한 표현들은 에세이로하여금 장황하게 만들 수 있기 때문에 주의하면서 에세이를 서술하시길 바랍니다. 수고많으셨습니다.
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