▶ Your Answer :
At first glance, the teacher or the leader tell something incorrectly when people are in a classroom or a meeting, it might be better to say nothing or waiting to tell them later. However, I personally disagree with the above ideas for a subsequent reason. First and foremost, incorrect information makes people to be confused confuse (make 뒤에는 동사 원형이 나와야 합니다). To be specific, delivering precise information to people is one of the primary qualifications to be a teacher and a leader. Because they are sometimes able to make mistakes, it is important for people who are in the same space to correct their mistakes instantaneously to become a teacher and a leader. As they can make mistakes, it is important for people to correct such wrong answers. If not, incorrect information can be spread easily after the class or meeting, so correcting them is the easiest way to continue the class or meeting efficiently so that correction is important to continue the class or meeting. Let me bring up my personal experience as an example. When For example, when (let me bring up~같은 표현은 너무 구어체 입니다) I was in high school, my math teacher who was 80 years old said one of the math concepts wrong during the class. No one except myself knew about that he was wrong wrong instructions, so I decided to tell him about it after the class. When I told him, he understood what I said and promised that he would correct the mistake. However, he forgot to correct it in the class and even he got to believe that he did not say incorrectly. The situation was totally forgotten, so he made a myriad of questions regarding the concept for the final exam at the end of the semester. Every student dealt the quiz with their knowledge which was said incorrectly by the teacher, but I could handle them the correct way. As a result, students got significant low scores on the exam and really upset about that he did not correct the mistake. After this happen such happening, I faced the same happen in my science class, and then I interrupted and correct the teacher’s mistake right away. She thanked a lot for me because she believed that it is the most efficient way to correct mistakes instantaneously and it always helpful for others because they do not have to think about incorrect information anymore. For this reason, I strongly believe that correcting the mistake right away is the best way to deal a certain situation such as listening incorrect information from the teacher or the leader, because it would not make any confuse between people who listened to the mistake.
점수: 20 일단 전체적으로 너무 장황한 독립형 에세이입니다. 독립형 에세이에서 가장 중요한 부분을 차지하는 것은 설득력 인데. 지금 이 에세이 같은 경우는 인트로 부터 시작해서 결론까지 모두 다 너무 장황하기 때문에 무엇을 전달하려고 하는 것인지 모르겠습니다. 또한 예시가 너무 긴데 이 예시 자체가 주제와 전혀 관련이 없습니다. 따라서 간결하게 주제와 연관을 지으면서 예시를 선정하시길 바랍니다. 수고많으셨습니다. |